A woman talks about how she became a surrogate mother
Over the past decade, surrogacy has become a global phenomenon and a salvation for those who cannot have children. But the interesting question is how women come to the decision to become surrogate mothers? To answer this question, we turned directly to women who decided to become surrogate mothers and help those who cannot bear a fetus on their own. Chelsea from NW Surrogasy Center (NWSC) shared her story.
Contents of the article:
How I came to surrogacy
It is very difficult to describe such a rewarding and unique experience in a few words. But let me start my story by telling you about my personal life. My name is Anna. I am 37 years old, I am a single mother. I have a four year old girl. I was in a relationship for 10 years and married.
When we decided to start a family, I thought it would happen easily and quickly. However, after 18 months, we came to the conclusion that my husband needed to be evaluated for infertility.
During the diagnostic process, we discovered that my sperm count was very low. I couldn”t even breathe because of how empty I felt. Because of this, I understood that in the near future our family would decline. But I desperately didn’t want to believe it.
To avoid what I mentioned above, we immediately began looking into IVF and adoption as alternatives. We changed our daily routine and went on a diet. But good things in life still happen if you wait a long time for them.
It wasn”t until two months after receiving the bad news (on my 32nd birthday) that we found out I was pregnant. We were shocked and excited. We were both a little nervous. Nine months later, my dream of having a daughter came true. I will never forget that desperate feeling when I realized that you and your husband were forming a deep connection that had nothing in common.
After the birth of my daughter, I accidentally came across an advertisement for surrogacy on Facebook. At first I didn”t think it was important, but only after I realized that I was constantly thinking about this ad. This stuck in my brain for several years.
When I was a few years younger, I remember my mom telling me how she thought about surrogacy—how she thought it would be a good idea. But not everything was so simple. She wasn”t ready to have a child. And it was all over.
The memory of these words to some extent confirmed my decision to become a surrogate mother. But the idea of helping the family and the idea that there was no connection with my child sank even deeper into my head. I decided to put this idea aside until better times.
Soon after I forgot about it, we decided to move to another city. As luck would have it, the law in this place allowed a surrogate mother, and I was very happy about this news.
Gradually, I brought my husband to my decision. He thought I was stupid and even took offense at me. But after some time, he himself raised this topic and suggested contacting people working with surrogate mothers. We went to the medical center.
During my first journey as a surrogate mother, we met a good couple who wanted a child. My coordinator emailed me the details of this family. There were photographs and personal stories about their lives, their relationships and what led them to surrogate motherhood. The couple is about 30 years old, and over the past few years, all attempts at the venture have been unsuccessful.
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The family lost their first child when the mother gave birth to him prematurely. The second pregnancy gave them a son. They were born very early, but fortunately they survived. After two less successful births, they were advised not to try again. However, the desire to allow the child overwhelms them.
When I saw their ad my heart sank. I couldn”t imagine losing them. Their story touched me and I knew I had to help them. After my answer, we contacted the young family and discussed all the important issues.
Our first meeting took place via Skype. As soon as I saw them, my fear evaporated. Even though we had never met or communicated with each other before the video call, the conversation was easy and natural. We laughed and cried.
A few months later I began to undergo a full medical examination. I found out that I have hypothyroidism. This required immediate treatment. After stabilization of all parameters, embryo transfer was carried out.
I became a surrogate mother at 16 | animated story
One day, in the second trimester of pregnancy, I said that sleeping was becoming uncomfortable. A few days later, on the porch of the house, I saw a large box — they bought me a pillow for pregnant women. This is just one of the many sweet things they have done for me and my family.
During my pregnancy, we were very close to this couple. To this day, I can”t believe how accurately they chose the family. We found out that they had a son on Thanksgiving Day. It was a wonderful day. I will never forget how their two-year-old son said “my brother” when he saw the ultrasound machine screen. Two days after the ultrasound, they all went home. The next time, after the baby was born, they waited.
The pregnancy proceeded as easily as in the case of their daughter. But this boy had his own schedule. I loved feeling him move in my stomach every night, reminding us that he was listening to us. We were looking forward to the birth. And then the day came. Unfortunately, no members of the boy”s family were present at the birth.
I couldn”t believe I had successfully executed this perfect little man. But at the same time, I was so angry that his family missed the whole event. I sent them video clips and photos to share the good news of their baby”s birth. Twelve hours later they arrived at the hospital. Joyful tears, laughter and gratitude flowed from every corner of their happy hearts.
Almost four months have passed since the birth. We keep in touch several times a week. They send me pictures of their baby and I can”t wait to snuggle with him again. The biggest surprise in this whole wonderful experience has been how much I love them. Now they are my family.
Of course, this process includes things like injections and medications. And we won”t even ask questions about whether it”s hard to let someone down or say goodbye to a child. But all this passes. The only child born is healthy and strong.
My daughter and I will go to see them in early July. We cherish the moment of separation between us. We”re not just talking about our children, we”re talking about our lives. We talk about our lives, stupid stories, we only share what is going on in our heads. This is truly wonderful.
Many people asked me after giving birth what it was like to be a surrogate mother. I said it was like buying Christmas gifts for poor children — we are helping families whose children cannot give birth themselves. These are sensations that cannot be described in words.
The story of my surrogate mother is amazing. And I don”t intend to stop. Every child is a part of my heart and a part of my love. I hope I can help more than one family.
