Basic rules for dating a guy. How to start and keep it for a long time
Today the Internet, and accordingly social networks, in most cases, relationships with men are tied precisely to the network. Thus, many of the rules of flirting, dating and, accordingly, relationships themselves are familiar to our mothers and grandmothers today and have been somewhat modified. However, the basic rules remain the same.
Contents of the article:
Don”t wait for an invitation
This rule applies only to representatives of the fairer sex. And even then, this is not all cases. If a girl likes a confident and thoughtful macho, of course, you shouldn’t force yourself on him and almost force him to pull himself up on a date. This suggests that he is in many ways the opposite. Men of this type are not shy about making their own decisions and determining whether they need a relationship with a woman. This advice applies to sick and insecure men and women. Even if they genuinely like a girl, they often can”t bring themselves to take the first step and ask her out on a run-of-the-mill first date. Even science has proven that women are more sensitive on an intuitive level. Therefore, it is almost impossible not to understand that someone likes her exactly the way she is. This is where the sick partner needs a little help. This is not about putting your patience under pressure, but about “swinging” like a multi-ton truck. Each situation is purely individual. Perhaps you need to “shoot” your eyes a little. When the chosen one understands that his feelings are mutual, it becomes easier for him to take the first step.
Focus on Responsiveness
Here we can also return to the theme of a brutal and self-confident person. Oddly enough, this type is most similar to women. On the one hand, they can be understood. Next to the representation and power of the male half of humanity, you really feel like you are behind a stone wall. It is the boundary between this stone wall and the chamber with the suffocating rods. Then it becomes very thin. The fact is that men of this type are almost always authoritarian, and their intimacy is not as simple as it might seem at first glance. Their narcissistic nature may simply not allow them to ignore the opinions of others, including the girl they love. Therefore, it is necessary to check the “macho” in advance to avoid phrases addressed to you such as “none of your business”, “shut up” or “seriously”. How? This is quite easy to do. First of all, it is worth paying attention to his attitude towards people employed in the service sector, such as waiters in cafes and restaurants, taxi drivers and maids in hotels. If he treats them like second-class citizens, sooner or later they will suffer the same fate, and the woman of his heart will become the woman of his heart, no matter how much she was loved in the beginning.
How not to scare a guy
Oddly enough, this applies to both strong, brutal men and their more timid “brothers”. The secret here is that men and women perceive communication and even sex completely differently. And many girls who have not had time to initiate a relationship with a man almost immediately begin to perceive him almost as a husband. But, on the contrary, men do not consider themselves obliged to a girl or attached to her either after the first date (even a successful one) or after the first sex. In their understanding, they remain free and independent. These are the main mistakes of girls who, after the first few meetings, begin to plan out loud their future life — buying a new apartment, planning wedding celebrations, choosing a name for their first child.
For most people, the reaction to such “attacks” is undoubtedly negative. Not wanting to lose freedom, they try to end the relationship as soon as possible, without waiting for them to be hooked. Therefore, dear woman, if you do not want to ruin your relationship with a man, do not force things and let him decide that you are the one he loves the most and who is unique.
Excessive availability
Sometimes girls fall in love with crazy men. At that time, most of the fairer sex made the main mistake — they completely dissolved in their loved one. It seems amazing — he went back and forth and asked him out on a date. In other words, in his presence you can show your cards (emotions) completely. Of course, to some extent this is possible, but no one would say that she remains such an ice queen — cold and unapproachable. However, do not bend the stick in the opposite direction. Once you completely dissolve in a man, you will soon become completely uninteresting to him. Many women in love begin with the enthusiasm of a good student, Komsomol member or activist, and study all areas that interest them, regardless of which side of life they belong to — work or hobby.
In the end, the conversation during the meeting revolves only around him and his interests (football, hockey, chess, equestrian sports, changing the stock exchange, breeding cockroaches in Madagascar), it does not matter. The only important thing is that by talking only about topics that are interesting to him and at the same time repeating every few words about how much you love him and how unique and incomparable he is, you can achieve the exact opposite result and completely kill all emotions! For myself.
Read also: All about relationships and rules of behavior between a guy and a girl i can discuss relationships with girls without restrictions. Not everyone will be able to treat their partner correctly, so everyone will have their own point.
Every soul always remains a hunter, that is, a conqueror. Therefore, he is not interested in “a victim who surrendered without a fight.” If a woman has no mysteries and understatements, she becomes like a book that can be read. So why not go to the library and find a new unread book?
Cold touchy
Here the situation is radically opposite to the previous one. Many girls start pretending to be inaccessible rocks, afraid of appearing too close. But, as they say, everything is good in moderation, and in this case the main thing is not to overdo it. Nobody tells you to say yes to a date for the first time. But you also shouldn’t “marinate” a man for several weeks or months, because his thoughts follow a completely logical path. In some cases, he may think that he is not interested in you at all and try to switch to another object of courtship.
In another case, even worse, it allows one to make mental accusations of non-traditional sexual orientation. Yes, exactly. Men also have a rich imagination and can easily “figure out” how to fall in love with a neighbor’s porch. Therefore, when establishing a relationship with a man, try to adhere to the rule of the “golden mean”!
Don”t be intimidated by responsibilities
Of course, every woman needs strong, caring male shoulders. This is especially true for representatives of the fairer sex, who at one time were burned and were left alone to raise their children. They had just begun their relationship with a man who, from the first days, began to impose many obligations and shift the solution of many personal problems onto them. Few men perceive such brain attacks as normal. In the modern world, completely different priorities have been established, and no one values a weak, amorphous and lame woman. Today women should be able to solve their problems on their own. This applies to problems at home, disputes at work and quarrels with documentary neighbors. And even if she can’t hang a shelf on her own or fix the faucet in the bathroom, she should at least call a master, and not sit and wait for her new lover to turn into a jack of all trades. If the relationship with this girl is important to him, he himself will pay attention to her everyday and business problems and make decisions about some of them. Note — only some of them. Don”t expect him to turn into some kind of “good fairy”. Satisfy all desires.
Do not limit his communication
Very many pretty women, immediately after starting a relationship with a man, begin to consider him almost as their property. This concept also includes all his free time and the fact that the man must be loved by her.
What stupid mistakes do all newbies in relationships make?
“Friendship” with his habits
Here it is worth returning to the fact that in a relationship both partners remain independent and fully formed characters and independent personalities. Therefore, it is very stupid to expect that after such perfection you enter into a relationship with this person, he will immediately change his usual way of life. No, honey, that will never happen. No matter how much he loves you, the habits ingrained in him will remain with him forever. And it doesn”t matter what exactly is being discussed. He may grunt while eating, leave dirty dishes on the table, like boiled harvest for breakfast, create an incredible stench, leave dirty socks near the sofa or get into worn out shoes in the bedroom. Do not delay or end the relationship if you are initially worried about what your chosen one is used to, and you are not ready to put up with it. This is especially true if a man has bad habits — alcohol, smoking or, even worse, drugs. There are no options here at all.
Control of emotions
A very important factor is that the relationship with a man should be long-lasting and develop into true mutual love. Don”t confuse your loved one with some kind of lightning rod. No one is saying you can”t cry at his best or get angry behind your back at your daijutsu boss (it”s still better not to do this on the first date).
What we are talking about here is that if you are in a bad mood, you should never take your feelings out on a man. It doesn’t matter what exactly caused the breakdown — a scandal at home or at work, an important day, the death of a beloved hamster, etc. If you feel that you are in a bad mood, it is better to join forces, come up with a good reason and refuse the date. Never meeting is much better than meeting and immediately quarreling. And one more result of such a meeting is inevitable. Not a single person can hear your hysterical scandal. Especially if he is personally innocent before you.
Don”t exaggerate
When we start a relationship, many of us want it to look better than it actually is. Here lies the problem — sooner or later the truth will come out anyway. And it doesn’t matter what exactly you lied about — about the size of your apartment, the presence of a car (yacht, dacha, Arabian horse in the stable of the family castle), a scientific degree in physics or a black belt in karate — there comes a moment when the secret becomes clear. And in this case, it is unlikely that at least one man will allow his girlfriend to tell such lies — a breakup is inevitable. Yes, as a rule, if you look at the situation from the other side, it is unlikely that you will really like a relationship where you are loved for who you are, and not exaggerated!
The most important thing
Of course, there is a huge amount of advice on how to establish and integrate a relationship with a man — from friends, relatives, colleagues, from the print media, the opinions of psychologists or the Internet. But nowhere is the right place for you. Each relationship is highly individual, and you have to “feel” what you choose, so to speak.
By the way, many couples who have lived together for many years remember their first relationship and say that they seemed to feel their friend, his mood, thoughts and feelings. In their opinion, this made their relationship ideal and their love mutual.
