Polygamous woman or girl as a cultural phenomenon of the 21st century
In Russian there is a less simple and less censored analogue of the concept of “monogamous women”. In itself, it already reflects the attitude of society towards such a phenomenon. The sexual revolution seemed to give women the nominal right to control their sexuality, change partners and generally behave like men, but in reality it only gave men more rights. Sex from marriage has gone from being a voluntary, optional, and violent act for women to yet another socially condemned choice.
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The concept of polygamy
At the same time, it is important to understand that monogamy simultaneously involves a number of common sexual contacts. That is, in practice, a monogamous woman is one who had only one sexual partner in her entire life, married him and stayed with him in the 19th century.
Positive effects of polygamy
Fortunately, in the 21st century, more and more women are not afraid of their own voices and opinions, and sociologists and therapists have the opportunity to learn women”s stories first-hand, rather than from speculation. Within certain limits, polygamy has many positive and understandable consequences
- Recognizing your sexuality. No matter how wonderful a lover he is, a single partner cannot reveal all aspects of female sexuality. What if fortune didn’t smile, and instead of a skilled lover, an inexperienced woman got a boy who doesn’t know how to do anything? Tolerate until the end of life or make a choice in favor of the next one?
- Increased self-esteem. Not the best way to deal with self-esteem, but perhaps one of the simplest. The right kind of male attention can make a woman feel beautiful and desirable. And the more a man is ready to meet a particular woman head-on in order to possess her, the more his self-esteem will soar.
- Emotional drain. Many women, for various reasons, are not ready for marriage or a long-term relationship, but they are not ready for it without sex. The output is short-term communication with clearly defined goals.
- Models of male behavior. To achieve success in their professional field, women are forced to try on models of male behavior. Unfortunately, it is often impossible to separate work and personal life, and the “male model” takes on inflated forms, for example, when applied to men’s ways of coping with stress.
- Repressed homosexuality. Women often have to spend years admitting that they are not attracted to men. In order to recognize their orientation, women try to prove the opposite to themselves in advance. The positive aspect of polygamy here is the understanding that one man may be bad in bed, but if this does not add up to everyone, then the problem lies elsewhere.
Polyandry in culture and life
One of the rare forms of polygamy is monogamy or polyandry. And if we talk about polygamous women in many contexts, we must understand that such marriage systems do exist in Sri Lanka, Tibet, Brazil and other parts of Asia, Africa and South America. Of course, this approach is a harsh indictment of patriarchy, but according to objective research, it is a completely logical institution of marriage.
The boundaries of the gender distribution of work and responsibility are erased, in contrast to the situation when one man has several men, and one woman has several women, and trade union members are recognized as equal to each other and the service personnel.
Polyandry provides additional protection for offspring, reduces infant mortality and reduces the overall birth rate. Having two fathers increases your chances of survival significantly.
Polyandry is a solution that increases gender imbalance. For example, in India, where the birth of a girl has long been considered undesirable, there are now many more men than women. Therefore, breeding is a common practice in some villages.
There is also sibling polygamy, where one woman comes to the husband of one of the brothers. This tradition still exists in poor countries and is associated with the need to leave all property within one union.
Contrary to the ruling, polygamy is a logical form of group and guaranteed population regulation, a partial solution to the problem of poverty and protection of offspring.
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Each person has his own ideals of relationships and partners. Both sexes have what is most important to the other. For example, women prefer those in charge.
Dependence of polygamy on gender
The phenomena of polygamy and monogamy should be considered in the context of historical significance and culture, and not as a moral norm for modern people.
This does not mean that polygamy is sex addictive. Since their gaze is turned to history, it can be noted that polygamy and polyandry are in keeping with the spirit of events and times. The difference between the forms of polygamy is that polygamy is a result of development and economic well-being, while polyandry is a necessary survival mechanism.
A polygamous man — you can’t trample against nature
Unlike women, men who commit sexual exploitation are considered successful and are recognized as leaders and conquerors in patriarchal societies. And vice versa, when a monogamous man becomes a role model and admiration, no one would think of accusing him of promiscuity and lack of secrecy.
This attitude only strengthens the myth that men are monogamous by nature and cannot share their lives with one partner, and that “swan fidelity” is a beautiful and meaningless fairy tale that interferes with life.
A scientific view of male polygamy
Male polygamy is a study of two sciences at once: biology and psychology. And if, from a biological point of view, polygamy is considered a natural process, then psychologists unanimously declare that polygamy is the weakness of men who cannot cope with their baser instincts.
Woman of the 21st century: what is she like?
Fortunately, labor created man from a monkey and gave him, in addition to instinct, a head on his shoulders, a society around him and internal psychological processes. Thousands of years of historical development have clearly shown that you cannot go far on instincts alone and you need to learn to somehow adapt to the surrounding reality. Marriage, whether monogamous or polygamous, is one way of adaptation. In a union, the likelihood of offspring survival is higher, the division of labor is a logically correct and fair decision, and you don”t have to constantly prove to all the women in the habitat that you”re still there because you always have access to one woman. Alpha males.
The benefits of male polygamy
Today, male monogamy seems to be nothing more than a convenient excuse for fornication. However, it is very easy to shift the burden of responsibility to basic instincts and close our eyes to the fact that a person is a thinking being responsible for his decisions and their consequences.
Of course, there are advantages to polygamy that do not go beyond the bounds of reason.
- Experience. Unfortunately, no one is born with a universal package of knowledge about how to have sex correctly so that everyone involved in the process enjoys sex. Monogamous men have a unique opportunity to gain valuable experience.
- Social status. Men themselves are within a patriarchal framework, where status is measured not by intelligence or achievements, but by visual indicators of success. Frequent changes of partners and mistresses are a measure of the success of a modern man. We can only believe that everything will change after the change of generations.
- Fighting stress. Boxing, running and sex are the best ways to relieve stress. The pressure on working people in modern society is so great that it is almost impossible to cope with it. Sex certainly relieves tension and allows people to deal with stress.
Disadvantages of polygamy for men
If we consider polygamy not only from the point of view of sexual relations, but also from the point of view of the institution of marriage, then, in fact, the most patriarchal institution is monogamous marriage. None of the men seemed to think about how wonderful it would be to have several wives. But has anyone thought about the other side of the coin? How much effort and attention is required for several women, how much income is needed to support a large family (all wives and children).
Marriage implies the shared responsibility of all its participants for the life, well-being and health of their children. However, take the example of an Islamic state where polygamy is a common practice. Women don”t work there, and all responsibility for well-being falls on the shoulders of men — more and more men prefer to settle down with one woman.
Benefits of Polygamy for Women
Essentially, in polygamy, women marry the most successful member of the family, and this is very easy, since women can first choose the “alpha male” who provides decent living conditions for them and their children. The rest of the wives are in this situation. Less successful males are left without a job altogether, unable to procreate, and rendered useless from a biodiversity perspective.
Monogamous marriage allows all males to have offspring, the only difficulty is that, unlike the ultra-successful alpha males, everyone else is forced to find workarounds and come up with ways to attract females from “other leagues.”
