“Stop living like this!” or signs of an unpromising relationship
Unfortunately, life gives no guarantees. Best friends become strangers to each other, strong marriages fall apart, milk first turns sour. These are the rules of the game that must be accepted.
Contents of the article:
Common interests, strong physical attraction and unity of soul are the most well-known signs of a promising relationship. What about an uncompromising relationship? Is it possible to somehow understand that your union is doomed on the coast? It”s possible. Read this article carefully and analyze your relationship with your partner. Perhaps you yourself have long suspected that something is wrong?
Suppression
Conflict resolution is impossible without healthy compromise. However, such concepts should not be confused with “compromise” or “restraint.” If, in order to save the world together, you have to give up everything you hold dear and suppress your true desires, can this be called a compromise? Why can”t you be yourself around this person? Why do you have to constantly adapt and overload yourself? The more important question is, are you willing to put up with it?
Concealment
You are afraid to tell the truth about your relationship with anyone. You shy away from family and friends. You are tormented by the fear of accusation. Torture, embellishment, deception and lies. You are willing to do anything to protect your partner. Protection. From what? Absolutely everyone should like your partner. But why are you afraid that the truth about your boyfriend or girlfriend won”t please your parents or your best friend? Does it matter? Or do you realize to yourself that your own relationships are not entirely healthy?
Apologies
You constantly apologize for. Anything. My friend also noticed this and brought it to my attention. “Sorry,” “Sorry, I’m not in the mood today,” “I don’t think so, sorry.” The habit of constantly apologizing is a warning sign. Such questions are typical for victims of moral abuse, who are systematically driven into a corner, forced to doubt their own righteousness and give up their desires and the right to free will. Look at your partner, has he imposed this inferiority complex on you?
Budget
You have too many different perspectives on financial matters. Even if you”re perfectly fine with your finances, sharp differences in perspective can become a serious problem down the road. Needless to say, a couple with an average income is doomed to constant arguments over this issue. How do they make money? How do they spend it? Save it? How much and where is it? If one of you prefers to live one day at a time and never miss a fun activity, while the other has already calculated all their income until retirement, problems are inevitable. One of you must compromise. Are you ready for this? What about your partner?
Growth
We must inspire each other to achieve new achievements and grow. This applies to appearance, career, and the future. Is this a hopeless relationship? Your partner doesn”t encourage you to watch your weight and health, wear nice clothes, or look sexy. Likewise, they don”t inspire you to try new things in bed, cook something delicious, or try to earn more money. You have no incentive to impress or surprise—it seems like no one is worth the effort. You live by the motto: “I have it all!”
Read also: 8 Signs of a Codependent Relationship and How to End It “love forever,” “One day you will die”—these words have become the motto of many people. What is that for many? It applies to everyone. Only these kinds of relationships.
“Well, we just live in stability, what is that?” Hmm, but generally nothing. But let me tell you a secret: there is no stability. You are either evolving or deteriorating. You realize that this very relationship is dragging you down—another surprising sign. Before meeting this person, you were full of strength and energy, always striving for something. And now only a little smoke remains from your former fire.
Exhaustion
For you, relationships aren”t just passionate nights, but also dinners in beautiful restaurants, travel, beautiful photos on Instagram. Relationships are work. In general, it should be moderate—joy replaces tears, selfishness works in peace, with attention. This is not a problem. For each of us, there is no ideal person or ideal relationship. When a relationship begins to resemble an endless obstacle course in the form of arguments, disagreements, hysterics, scandals, and “forever breakups,” time stops and we carefully consider. What is the meaning of all this? Do people enter into relationships to suffer?
Past
It”s impossible to have a healthy, strong relationship with someone who”s incapable of it. It”s impossible to cure a pathological JE who constantly tries to find evidence to prove your infidelity. “Why are you taking pictures with your ex? Are you not good enough for me? Or do those feelings still linger? And why did you come to my house yesterday? Run from the little mistakes of the past that constantly nudge you in the face. Don”t let the overwhelming burden of “healing” those who are poisoning your life take over.
Bed
Sleep separately; you sleep separately. You already have a full list of excuses: “he snores,” “she pulls all the covers over herself,” “I”m stuffy,” “I”m hot.” Most “unsolvable problems” aren”t even worth talking about. Ask yourself why you feel so uncomfortable sleeping next to your (supposedly) loved one. If you suffer from nightmares and insomnia, maybe your subconscious is hinting at this?
6 signs of a hopeless relationship
Insults
Jokes aside, this isn”t the norm. Why date someone who constantly tries to pick on you? Attacks don”t always involve physical consequences. Often, manipulators and abusers prefer verbal attacks. After all, it”s very easy to blame the victim. How sensitive! I didn”t say anything like that. No offense, but I”m ashamed.” Your loved one won”t joke about sensitive topics. And if they really want to help you, for example, lose weight, they”ll find other ways to hurt you. I”m saying you”re not fat to be ashamed of. “I only care about you, I want to beat you up!”
Wine
The truth is, it”s your fault. It”s your fault. Always. No matter what happens, it”s always your fault. Did you fire your partner? It”s all because of the tense atmosphere you create in the house! Your partner can”t find a job? And your old man! Your partner seems stuck somewhere in adolescence. They can”t admit their mistakes or take responsibility. Looking for a solution? Not at all! It”s better to complain about life and uproot yourself. A healthy relationship is between two adults. A baby is incapable of such feats. Are you ready to bear all the burdens?
Test
Is it possible to turn your uncompromising relationship into a promising one? Choose one of the answer options. a) We are ready to discuss this issue. b) Are ready to discuss problems and also solve them. c) we couldn”t discuss the article because we didn”t have time to read it. And in general we are not going to change anything. We keep complaining to each other about our friends and we keep blowing each other”s minds. Result: if you choose the first option, you have a chance to just start taking action. If you focus on the second option, you have a good perspective — you are two mature adults. P. S. b) There is no answer to this option. This is because you are unlikely to start doing anything until you are both older. Alternatively, don”t drive each other into a nervous breakdown.
