What are the 6 stages of development of family relationships?
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An unlimited level of trust and love in a couple is achieved through a lot of teamwork. However, one of my friends, who lived for several years in the second half of a relationship, uttered phrases like “the love has passed, but the habit remains.” Do all feelings end at the romantic stage or are there more complex stages of relationship development? This article will help you understand this.
Contents of the article:
Advance of the candy-bouquet stage
The initial period of relationship development is also called romantic. Sometimes it is confused with love. Why? After all, nature itself gives the initial impetus to the reconciliation of lonely hearts. Both release hormones of happiness in the body — dopamine, serotonin and endorphins.
Thanks to them, the image of an ideal partner in life matures in the mind. His flaws go unnoticed and undescribed. Perhaps this is due to non-existent virtues, or perhaps existing virtues were greatly embellished. The overall appeal of this process is that a person is ready to flap his wings with happiness and stop caring about everything else.
The words of the song “Love is Chemistry” are very suitable for the romantic stage of development of a relationship, if you remember the words of the song “Love is Chemistry”. Popular wisdom calls this period a candy bouquet, as life takes on new and bright colors. You want to endlessly thank your partner for the sensations caused by sweets, bouquets, dates and other delights.
This state has received a special name: “falling in love.” Love and infatuation differ in that the latter is a superficial emotion and is reinforced by hormones. However, their behavior cannot be a function of the entire human life. If the partner does not have obvious flaws in the eyes of the other half, the effect can last from several months to a year and a half. If it is more, then the human body may become exhausted.
Time duration indicators are conditional. For more experienced people already in a relationship, the euphoric state passes faster, since the behavior of pheromones is controlled or partially suppressed by the voice of reason. Various sources mention a figure of one year, when the effect of love chemistry ends. And the romantic phase of the relationship ends in the first months after legal marriage, or, as a rule, in the first days after the wedding and three years after marriage.
Before this period, people enjoy communication, intimacy and planning a bright future together. In most cases, they can form a marriage bond and have children. However, as already mentioned, the gifts of nature in the form of cool sensations cannot last forever. They are given to people in advance so that they can bond, get married, get married, have children and move to new levels of love.
But this transition is not always pleasant. Therefore, some couples decide to separate due to the belief that love has passed. Others try their luck with someone else and again experience similar feelings, but as soon as the effect of the pheromones wears off, a beacon goes off in their head with the short phrase “something is wrong.” This can be repeated endlessly until the person decides to go through the second phase of relationship development.
Power struggle, attempt to change a partner
When the hormonal influence ceases, the rose-colored glasses are removed, and the person faces a choice between loneliness and love. In most cases, this decision is made two or more times in a lifetime. You can change partners endlessly. It turns out to be a vicious circle that opens after you realize that you need to look at the situation from a completely different perspective. That is, stop chasing high levels of happiness hormones.
After the pheromones wear off, both come to their senses and stop trying to put each other in a better light. Disadvantages will appear. If before we seemed unimportant or cast nice glances at our other half, now we begin to get very irritated. We must decide where to go next: stay together or look for happiness somewhere on the side. It”s like a pendulum that swings first one way and then the other.
At first the person does not understand what happened. The problem is that love has been lost. In a good scenario, new hobbies, interests, and activities emerge that help ease the initial discomfort of the lost feeling. However, there are also inconvenient moments. They lie in the partner”s perceived shortcomings.
For women and men, marriage and a stamp in a passport are conditioned signals of relaxation. Before this, they tried to maintain a romantic relationship, but the feelings passed, and the partner began to look like one big flaw. This period of development of relations served as the basis for the emergence of humorous folklore. For example, in one anecdote, a man was talking on the phone with a friend when his wife had an accident and totaled his car. When a friend asked if she was okay, if she was alive? The husband replied: “No, she wasn’t. Locked in the bathroom.”
Read also: 7 stages of development of relationships between a man and a woman
An analysis of past relationships begins, or when nostalgia overwhelms you and you want to remember how it all began. Often people come to the conclusion that the past.
This period is also characterized by power struggles as both sides try to change each other. They believe that the reason for the emotional loss lies in the repulsive character traits of the woman/man, and therefore they need to change this person in order to return. In most cases, attempts are forced through manipulation or intimidation. However, when the realization comes that this does not help, the person either resigns himself, or turns his gaze inward, or leaves and blames his other half for everything.
It is very important that the desire to change is mutual. Otherwise, nothing will work. Overall, this period of a relationship is the first step towards true love. This will not only help you accept your partner for who he is, but will also help you improve yourself. For some people it is possible to adapt intensively to scandals and scenes, but for others it is more or less calm. Mutual respect grows between people, and relationships are no longer based only on romance and sex, but have moved to a higher level.
Patient attitude
In the previous stage, the lovers were taken down from their pedestals and scrutinized under a microscope. We are most interested in our loved one”s flaws. They turn out to be less beautiful than previously imagined. Moreover, the other person is making noise. This invisibly re-establishes each other”s personal boundaries. They no longer feel like a single entity, and they are reminded that there are personal aspirations and goals that don”t necessarily align with the opinions of their loved ones. But after much fighting and polishing, a lull has set in.
In movies, for example, the transitional period passes quickly. But in real life, unfortunately, it takes several years. When the couple endures the test, tolerance sets in. This state of affairs is an excellent foundation for true love. It”s difficult to estimate the time when people reach this stage. It can happen in the third year of marriage, or in the tenth or twentieth.
In most cases, it”s a struggle with personal egoism. There are certain benchmarks for when it can begin: having children and sharing property. Nowadays, people can”t rely solely on emotions and simply drift away. In good situations, people begin to understand that their emotions are often distorted and don”t reflect objective reality. Therefore, to avoid disrupting FIRE, they begin to work harder on their own and increase their tolerance.
It”s important to understand that there”s a significant difference between tolerance and patience. Patience often signifies a “victim,” i. e., someone who suffers pain or resentment against their will. Such patience will soon wear thin.
Tolerance is a voluntary decision to become a better person and a partner. It”s not an attempt to run away with a bottle of alcohol to avoid the inconvenience of the environment. It”s not the result of nirvana, where chaos unfolds and the person ignores it. Instead of resigning themselves to the accumulated problems, they say there”s no point in struggling. This is personal development. Both must be prepared for it. Here, people learn to be tolerant of others” shortcomings, respect their needs, and forgive their mistakes. At this stage, patience is far removed from the final level of love, and hope and the realization that one can move on are formed.
Satya • 6 Stages of Family Degradation
Satya • 6 stages of family degradation
Caring and giving
At the beginning of the period of relationship development, the stage of romance, guys and girls care and consider each other indifferent, but are under the influence of love hormones. Compassionate caring and true cooperation skills come as they learn to compete and be patient with their other half. This is what many couples dream about and what they consider first. However, not everyone is in crisis enough to take this step.
You may have to overcome trials of betrayal, contradictions between your intended life goals and their implementation. Reaching this level is a very difficult task. To reach such a peak, a person must humble his pride. Only in this way can he voluntarily serve others, in this case his wife. At the same time, it is not always possible to wait for an answer from your husband or wife.
This opens the door to more mature emotions. Firstly, a person will feel relief in the shoulder, the removal of a load, heaviness. The bonus is the feeling of corresponding necessity and the joy that you are getting something useful out of life. Who knows, maybe this year a second wind will open and dreams will come true.
Trust and respect
Trust and respect
By this time, couples have studied each other well, learned to accept, give, develop and maintain individuality, and have accumulated life experience. This is the second step from the end, followed by true love.
Bright colors are played by communication and mutual understanding in relationships. Such things are tested at the beginning of the journey, when progress is given in the form of love hormones, especially if love is just at the beginning. Here, however, the sensations are stronger and brighter. Feelings no longer depend on the “chemistry of love”.
In addition, there is no doubt: there is complete trust in the partner. Fear and horror are bypassed, anxiety and tension disappear. The main feature is not pronounced trust, but natural one.
Love
Love
Communicating with people who have learned to love is delightful. Their words have extraordinary power. They do not judge, they accept a person as he is and forgive his weaknesses and misdeeds. I wanted to return to them again and again and, as a rule, never leave.
Peaceful power comes from them. When this state is achieved in a couple, a person was able to fully realize his natural need — to learn to love. However, this skill is never given as such. People undergo lengthy testing. As they say: “I do not seek happiness in a safe haven.” Therefore, achieving this step requires extraordinary courage and determination.
Stages of developing the right relationships. satya das
