Who is a generous man and is it good?
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Generous men are a tasty morsel for many women. At least that”s what they think. But are they really that sweet? Let”s look into this.
Contents of the article:
When we hear the expression “generous man,” we immediately imagine a plump, good-natured man with a joyful smile, throwing money left and right. On the other hand, generosity is one of the qualities of a person who encourages others to give selfless help, charity, or gifts.
And somehow I don’t want to call the person generous who adopts two or three children, indifferently invites them to babysit their sick mother, and stays after school to explain a topic they don’t understand. And this is exactly what is called selfless help.
By the word “generosity” we meant the gift of money. There is no need to return the money. A generous person is one who showers everyone with money and at the same time needs a smile on his face. Imagine that a person gives money, but at the same time complains. Do you think he is generous? Rather, in your understanding, he would be stingy (and the fact that he did give money is not taken into account).
Nuances of our perception
In fact, the concept of a “generous person” is very unstable and completely illogical. There are so many nuances in our minds that it is impossible to call someone truly generous with this term. We make mistakes, but thinking about it is not enough.
- If a person gives away his last shirt, carries a basket of apples every day for his children, or does a bunch of things at the dacha, but cannot give money (because he has nothing), he does not fall into this category. Generous.” You didn”t give him money, you scoundrel!
- If a person always gives from 5 to 10, 000 rubles, but one day refuses to give 100 rubles, he also does not belong to the category of “generous”. And generosity means that he always gives money and never refuses (for any reason).
- Generosity is the opposite of thriftiness. In fact, what is economic can be generous, but in our opinion the two concepts are not interchangeable.
- If your man never gives you money, doesn”t give his mom money for a new purse, or doesn”t give your girlfriend money for a trip abroad, he”s not being generous either. Generosity means that money is given to everyone without constant refusal. So yes!!! And again with a smile on your face!
- If your man showers you with gifts every day, but does not give you money, such a man is a reptilian, but not at all generous.
- If a man has invested money in your business (your home, your education, your health, your son”s education, etc.), but you have not received any finances from him, there is no point in being generous about it. No money, no generosity.
- Purely automatically generous people are attributed such qualities as joy, reliability, kindness, smiling and recklessness.
- A generous person should give money without counting it. What kind of generosity would it be if he counted every penny!
That is, the following portrait emerges from above — a generous person is a person who enthusiastically gives an unlimited amount of money to everyone who asks, does not dare to refuse anyone and does not even think about calculating the amount of what he will have to part with.
Do you agree? Think about who you consider generous. Perhaps your opinion will change.
Do you want to become his wife?
But now it’s worth thinking about: does such a husband need such a thing?
Here”s an example. One of our family members married a man. I”m talking about tolerance, not about Russian nationality. Sociability is a national trait of these people. In fact, these people are raised to be generous from a very young age. Women are obliged to generously treat and greet everyone who crosses the threshold of the house, and men are obliged to simply shower their beloved with gifts and money (in essence, this was our Holy Mother). The man did not stop being generous after finding a woman, but this did not save the situation.
He was very generous. Our friend, already in the second week of marriage, was generous, his eyes were familiar, and his generosity was at its best. It was customary to receive guests in your home. Whenever they come. They can appear at 7 pm, midnight or 2 am.
At the same time, women were required to smile, throw the richest treats on the table and radiate joy in order to get up from the meeting. Well, for such meetings, at least once a month, but every day? Do you have small children? Are you on maternity leave? And if in the morning you don’t even have money for milk for the children, you go and borrow from your mother, and in the evening you become an op-fan. Again “long-awaited” guests and generous tables?
At the same time, when the husband has money, a parent”s relative, a friend”s friend”s parent relative who desperately needs money, is inevitable! By the way, it’s enough to say: “I’m from such and such.” You must give them money. And they will give, but they will lie down with a smile and a handshake, “tropis is not nada.” The woman divorced her husband. Of course, she was not looking for a husband out of misfortune, but there was not so much deafness in her shoulders.
Read also: How to make a man generous — several proven methods
To learn how to do this yourself and teach a man to be generous, you need to understand what generosity is. First, there is the virtue of the “golden ratio” between.
So. Don”t rush into a lavish marriage. But. It remains to be seen whether a generous man is suitable for you as a wife. For a person to be called generous, he must have something to give. Who would call a person who lives from hand to hand generous? It is necessary that the master earn well, and that he be endowed with generosity to one and all of his salary. And the very marriage with a person who is already wealthy is already a blessing! And why should you be generous?
For example, your lover makes good money and can be very generous. But you have to consider that he is not only generous with you. His parental relative and his friends, his acquaintances, acquaintances of friends, parental relative of friends, etc. Do you need him to be needy or use his generosity and his friends too?
Another aspect is that a person who gives money to everyone without restrictions cannot be considered adequate. He gives money to just anyone because he created an unsuitable situation. For treatment — yes, for education — yes, about plastic surgery in the breasts of an 18-year-old girl.? For what? For the 27th dress? For what? If a person does not think about this, he is inadequate. And why is such inadequacy necessary?
It”s another matter when a person is temporarily generous. This is when he gives money in distant vision. In other words, it is not desirable for him to please for a while (and generosity is a very attractive quality). In our bouquet age, people give not only bouquets, but also sweets, jewelry and even cars! But. This may stop as soon as the guy decides to pursue you or move on to another beauty. If you do this, your wizard will wave his magic wand for you.
Well, you have to ask — where does this endless fountain of money flow from a person who helps people throw money around indifferently? Is everything clean?
�� male generosity
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The most striking example of a generous person is Sergei Sergeevich Palatov (“Cruel Rome”, the role of Palatov is played by Mikhalkov). That”s good, handsome! And one gypsy has money for a chest, and a girl who has gypsies has a lot of bills and doesn’t spare herself! Well, of course, “we drink to the tears, dear tears.” And how did the peasants end up? Very successfully, I must say. He married an “oil producer”. And before that, his generosity was snapped up by the entire parental staff, if anyone remembers.
So, what woman wants her generous husband to send his wife away with all the children in the world?
It”s also dangerous
Generous men, these are not so much pros as cons:
- When a person gives money to someone who asks for more than he can handle, he himself is forced to go into debt when the “black man’s day” inevitably comes. This would not have happened if the person had properly distributed his finances and not thrown money away.
- If a person is generous and can afford it, then people with dirty consciences will definitely rub shoulders with him. And what’s in their heads is not clear to everyone. Very often these “friends” replace generous comrades, so he has to go into hiding or dramatically change his life.
- Generous comrades inevitably give rise to parasites. At first, people simply take advantage of generosity, and then they begin to deliberately use the generous person for their own selfish purposes.
- Generous people do not always bring joy to their loved ones. This is due to the fact that very often they have to pay for the generosity of a loved one, feed him, protect him until he quickly disperses, etc.
- People (unfortunately) get used to everything good. If someone first accepts a generous gift as a sign of gratitude, then again and again takes it for granted, and if at some point the generous person”s voluntary donation ends, is this already a hostile reaction? Help with money and continue to help! It is very difficult to maintain good relationships when help is no longer accepted.
- If a generous person helps one person, others will begin to expect the same. Well, imagine — if a brother helps one sister, but does not help the other (even if the sisters live together), then it is obvious that the second sister will expect help from her brother. And if he refuses her. Explain further.
- If a person is generous, it is not at all necessary that he be respected, honored and led by the hand. Most often they lightly tap him on the shoulder and pat him on the tongue — “Well, well done, you helped! You’re absolutely awesome!” But the fact is that such people do not achieve real respect. And everything is understandable, they simply respect those who know how to say “no.” But we are genetically linked to reliability. Here”s why.
Long live greed?
One conclusion can be drawn from our entire article. Generosity is stupid, dangerous and unnecessary, greed is everything!
Not as such. The best is at the center of everything. Each indicator is something to strive for.
Therefore, deciding to maintain the status of a generous man, but avoiding all the negatives mentioned above, try:
- Pamper women with gifts not only during courtship, but throughout their entire family life. And immediately calculate your strength so that after the gift you will not be left without pants.
- If you decide to help someone, is it better to give the person a “fishing rod” than to put a fish in his mouth? Do good work, give good advice and get it to the right people. This helps not only with money.
- Never “throw away” money without an account. You will soon stop doing good anyway, but the money will disappear like water into sand.
- Don’t strive to be called “generous”; why do you need this title? It”s better to spend your money more rationally.
- Charity is very good, but besides this there is also your own life, the life of your loved ones, your children and your parents. Therefore, it is better to allocate a certain amount to charity and leave the rest for your own needs.
- Learn to say no. Even very generous men should be able to refuse.
- Don”t let anyone sit on your neck. Remember that even the wives of oligarchs try to run their own businesses. In other words, they want to work. If your loved one wants to do housework, let her do it (she doesn”t need to hire 27 maids), and if she wants to work, give her the opportunity.
- Remember, if you give your beloved your fifth car in a year, and your children from your first wife cannot wait for comfort from you, you have no right to call yourself generous. Yes, and your loved one will soon think — if you treat your children like this, is it worth coming to you? If she doesn”t need you as a fat wallet, consider it done.
And the most important advice is to observe every measure — in giving gifts, providing support, borrowing money, treating friends. A sense of proportion is the only thing that can never be too much.
