Why Do Men Cheat? The 6 Main Reasons According to Men
A profound betrayal is a huge blow for everyone, even in the strongest relationships. I was most disappointed when a man changed. After all, he is the support of the entire family, the protector, the shepherd. Women who are housewives and raising their children have no hope for the future, with the exception of some relatives.
Contents of the article:
Why are men already in strong and long-lasting marriages? After all, this often comes as a surprise, especially if there are few problems and disagreements in the family.
Several sociological studies have been conducted among married and single men. The goal was to uncover the true reasons for their unlawful behavior. In particular, some spoke in detail about the motives behind such an unpleasant and dangerous approach to relationships.
However, in reality, the reasons for male infidelity in some cases differ from those for females. They are generally driven by family problems and the difficult lives of Russian men.
Infidelity strengthens relationships
The most common reason why men settle for sex outside the relationship is the weakening of the meaning of family life. Over the years of marriage, the feelings that brought the couple together often fade away. The marriage itself becomes akin to a job. There, each person fulfills their assigned duties without any special feelings for them.
The relationship becomes dominated by dullness, boredom, monotony, and depression. Both spouses understand the situation but are unable to do anything about it, and the situation gradually worsens. However, if a man cheats on another woman and takes responsibility for the joy, pleasure, and happiness, he returns home and shares that pleasure with another woman. In some cases, respondents say it”s betrayal that strengthens relationships and saves them from falling apart.
Here”s what one of the respondents, named, has to say about this.
“I rarely meet relationships in which the feelings do not go away. All my friends live together simply by inertia. In fact, yes. Home, work, home. I run in the morning, spend several hours in the aquarium in the evening. Before everything started to change, I felt that everything was slowly going to hell. My wife did everything automatically, seemingly not paying attention to me. We talked about family problems.
But once I did it, I changed and at the same time felt no remorse. I walked home smiling, and my wife looked at me and smiled. For the first time in several months. I don”t even blame her for stopping loving me in that regard. But this does not mean that the family should be destroyed due to lack of emotions. And we started to improve everything.”
The wife doesn”t want sex or doesn”t satisfy the man in bed
Men are sometimes disappointed in women in intimate terms. This could be due to a number of reasons. Instead of the desired level of trust between spouses, men are unable to fulfill their most desired fantasies with their wives. Or the woman is too busy taking care of the house, children or work. She just doesn”t have the power of sex.
Or, after many years of relationship, the man ceases to be sexually attractive to her, and his wife no longer wants sex. In this case, the man experiences an acute lack of physical intimacy, which can cause deterioration in mood, well-being and depression. In this case, he can easily decide to cheat, constantly reminding his wife that she is still not satisfied or dissatisfied.
Andrey, one of the study participants, told the following story.
“So, you”re asking why do men cheat? Most of us miss the sex we get from our spouses. My wife has the exact same problem and we”ve discussed it many times. We know we need to work on our relationship to make it last as long as possible. But if I”m willing to do all the work and everything I can in bed, then he”s not ready. But I have fun with her, she continues to take care of me, but sexually we don”t get along.
What else should I do? Masturbate? Apparently I found a girl who was hungry for sex. We only met regularly for one night. I don”t think it”s serious or bad. This is necessary to prevent my roof from collapsing. And because I am healthy and happy, my feelings about lack of sex do not affect my relationship with my wife or children.”
And when there is no sex with my wife, we read the link
Men can”t control their desires
Some representatives of an influential part of the world”s population cannot resist the natural polyelectrified tendency. This is the most common reason for male infidelity, according to the general population. Moreover, men themselves are convinced that nature itself tells them to change partners for sex as often as they want.
For this reason, infidelity can occur even with the participation of men who were not predisposed to it before accepting this stereotype. In addition, for many men it is a way to assert their self and increase self-confidence. Numerous partners are an indicator that a man is interested in almost any girl.
Read also: Why does a loving man cheat: how to find out about cheating and what to do
A cheating partner puts a couple”s relationship at risk. Is it possible to talk about one type of love when he has another? In fact, they absolutely exist.
Even the presence of a permanent relationship cannot prevent such people from showing their natural inclinations. Some people think this is normal, others consider it unacceptable. However, facts are facts. Men are not good enough for one partner and therefore often change all of them.
One of the respondents, Alexander, told how this happened to him:
“I”ve been cheating on girls all my life. Obviously, I”m just that kind of person. They always told me that I give in too much to my emotions, and this is true. But when I got married, everything changed for a while. I love my wife very much and decided that no matter how much I wanted it, I would never cheat on her. I lasted in this mode for almost four years. Then it broke. It was hard for me mentally to be with her.
I wasn”t particularly interested in sex with her; she suffered from it. But as soon as I slept with another person, I immediately returned the passion to my husband. I would like to be in a relationship where I could sleep with any woman. I don”t think it”s a bad thing just for sex. My sex life with my wife has become normal because I sleep with some girls.”
Marriage too early
Early registration of relationships is one of the most common reasons for betrayal by both Russian men and women. Due to the fact that marriage can solve many financial, housing and other problems, people use it to make their lives easier. Or young people are too preoccupied with their new feelings and reasons for falling in love to connect their lives with a real family as soon as possible.
It”s not hard to guess. Such a relationship cannot last long, and sooner or later one of the spouses is sure to feel that he did not make things “interesting” and, therefore, limited his freedom too early. As they say, he couldn”t stand it.
Such betrayals are not surprising. Rarely do we come across relationships in our time that begin in schools or colleges and last at least 10-15 years.
Artem experienced a similar relationship and shared his experience during a sociological study.
Many relationships are interconnected. But most of them last a long time. But I thought it was something special. And my girl is special. Everything we have is strong and durable. But in the end, two years later, I realized that we had changed. Not that those feelings have cooled down. But she became a different person. And I liked the fact that we met two years ago. Gradually we grew apart and I decided to cheat on her because I met a new girl.
Why do men cheat? 3 real reasons why men cheat
Divorce is too difficult
Many of the men interviewed by the sociologist admitted that their marital relationships were outdated. There are no feelings, passions or interests from the past. There seems to be a need to diversify and move forward in different ways. However, the process of ending a relationship is too complicated, especially if it has been going on for several years. Many moral, financial and legal issues arise. This can lead to the fact that one of the spouses has limited communication with children
Alternatively, he must lose a significant part of his property. Males may also experience this due to the reputation they have after leaving the relationship. At the same time, the prospect of being caught by his mistress somehow frightens them less. It is much easier for a man to maintain his current relationship than to regularly date a “leftist” girl and eliminate the consequences of the breakup.
Opinion of Victor, one of the participants in the study on this topic:
I lived with my wife for almost 20 years. We had a common relationship. Children, home, work. Now I feel that she has begun to move away from me. She had her own interests, she was not very willing to communicate with me about her problems. We don”t have dinner together. Of course it”s inconvenient. But where are we going? I can”t leave my family. Even if my feelings for my wife wane, I still love my children very much.
Divorce may make it impossible for me to communicate with them as freely as I do now. This is not necessary. We meet with your mistress from time to time and just sleep. I keep her at a distance, she doesn”t claim anything. Because she is in almost the same situation. All my risks are reflected in this. And I don”t intend to leave my wife. This has a huge impact on our children”s lives. I don”t want them to think I abandoned them.”
It was just a moment of weakness
Not all infidelities are long meetings between married men and their mistresses. Often genders arise under random circumstances, of which there can be a huge variety. Moreover, such betrayal is not dangerous for the relationship. When does such betrayal occur? Firstly, under the influence of alcohol.
At parties, birthdays, picnics or nightclubs, you can easily get drunk and succumb to the fleeting desire to “take possession of the nearest toilet of a beautiful blonde.” Or the man has been alone for too long due to business trips or other trips on which he cannot take his wife with him. Then at some point he meets a colleague suffering from loneliness.
Temporary sex without commitment does not harm either of them. Both partners understand this. Consequently, betrayal occurs. Of course, you can blame a person for his mistakes, the influence of circumstances or negligence. But such cheating does not pose a serious threat to the relationship, unless, of course, it has blown up into a larger problem.
Danil, one of the study participants, spoke about how he created such betrayal.
“For work, I had to go to the USA for about a month. For a long time I was sad without my wife. Because I love her very much. And one of my colleagues in another country experienced the same feeling. One night we decided: “Why not?” We went to bed. In the morning everything was as usual.
Nobody said anything, but I felt terrible because I gave in to this feeling. But my wife forgave me when I told her about it. She said it was really a momentary weakness and a mistake if I really cared. All people make mistakes. Why should I be an exception in this matter?”
As can be seen from the respondent”s answer, betrayal has its own reasons. If a woman suspects adultery, she should not immediately blame her husband for everything. In the end, he does this simply because there is something missing in the house. You need to look at yourself and understand what exactly doesn’t suit your spouse.
Although sometimes cheating on the part of a man is not a consequence of family problems or the harmfulness of his wife, but simply the result of their unpleasant character and inadequate perception of the relationship.
