Years later, parents still struggle to accept their children”s LGBT+ status.

Years later, parents get used to it.

Often, even years after a teenager comes out as gay, lesbian, or bisexual (GLB), their parents struggle to accept their child. Many describe their feelings about coming out as ranging from “quite difficult” to “incredibly difficult.”

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This data was collected by George Washington University. Overall, statistics show that for many parents, the difficult process of accepting their child”s sexual orientation takes, on average, several years. “Surprisingly, we found that parents who learned about this two years ago were just as distressed as those who just learned about it,” says David Huebner, PhD, professor at the Milken College School of Public Health at George Washington University.

The study is one of the first of its kind and the largest. Children (ages 10-25)—more than 1, 200 parents—were informed that members of the LGBT+ community participated in the survey.

Read also: And again about sex: listening to parents, but doing it our own way

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Sorry for the question—children from LGBT families

What the results show:

  • Two years later, parents are suffering just as much as they did at the very beginning.
  • White people cope with this news better than their counterparts. African-American and Hispanic.
  • The older a child gets, the more difficult it is for parents to accept their sexual orientation.
  • About five years after parents learn that their child is gay, lesbian, or bisexual (GAB), living with this knowledge becomes much easier.

Research shows that the main sources of parental anxiety in such cases include the fear that the child will face bullying or harassment, as well as popular notions about the child”s traditional (and heterosexual) future.

However, as David said, in most cases, parents shocked by such news continue to feel a deep sense of care for their children and adjust their views.

What”s easier to explain to a child than to an adult?

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