Features of BDSM psychology and its basic concepts
Thanks to the sexual revolution, people started talking about sex. In fact, you can find a variety of pleasures, some of which are mistakenly associated with kinks. BDSM psychology offers a different perspective on dominant-submissive relationships.
Contents of the article:
Basic terms
In the minds of city residents, the acronym BDSM is closely associated with such bizarre practices as spanking, humiliation and bullying. In fact, popular culture misrepresents the point. It is based on three main principles: safety, rationality and autonomy. For more information on the meaning of BDSM, see the article at the link.
Therefore, any coercion or aggression is unacceptable. Due to the fact that socially disapproved influences are used, both participants must be bound by an agreement. Special safe words are created that prevent people from doing things that are offensive to their partners.
Relationships are conventionally divided into roles — “subordinate”, that is, subordinate or submissive, and “main”, that is, dominant. Some people stick to this framework, others change their place of residence.
There are only three components:
- Binding
- Domination
- Sadism and masochism.
Which one to use is up to the couple to decide for themselves. An important point is compliance with safety rules. Responsibility for the health of the “lower classes” lies with the “highest”. Additional weapons—whips, whippings, and gags—are used in abundance.
Origins of technology
There is an opinion that BDSM psychology is only suitable for perverts and sick people. In fact, everything is different — this behavior is typical for most people.
If you look at primates, you will see the female pulling the tail of her babies. This way she can check the viability of her children. As a result, the mother realizes the need to take care of her offspring, the baby, which is an instinct of self-preservation. Those who escaped, unable to withstand the pain, quickly became prey to predators. Pain from tail twitching was closely associated with feeling confident that they were following the program.
Film “50 shades of gray”.
The human psyche operates on an unconscious level. Pain is perceived as an act of love and care. If parents often yell at a child, beat him or humiliate him, then, as an adult, he will strive for such an attitude. Unconsciously he associates her with love.
Read also: Basic tips for beginners in BDSM
Kinky sex is wonderful when you have a partner who shares your desires. Whether it”s BDSM or hardcore sex, it”s important to always follow a few rules.
A simple chain of associations is formed — getting there means taking responsibility for life. It”s hard to understand logically, but from a child”s point of view it all makes sense.
In various tests you can find the question: “Does a person want to be a child?” Someone will refuse because they remember childhood as a period of restriction. For others, the answer is yes. At this time, the responsibility lay with the mother, and the child simply played. Spanking, spanking, and the like are recognized as expressions of affection.
Hierarchy is based on humiliation and subordination.
Features of psychology
It”s impossible to say exactly why some people are attracted to BDSM practices. It is partly believed that everything lies in infantilism, addiction and improper upbringing. Such people are accustomed to perceiving the world in black and white and are fixated on the idea of teenagers.
Perhaps people are tired of their gray, boring life. The use of unconventional techniques gives vivid emotions. Belonging to a subculture contributes to the formation of a sense of “elitism”. In different roles, people unconsciously experience different emotions.
The need to dominate and subjugate someone is due to the fact that in real life no one trusts people. Therefore he satisfies this need.
In BDSM psychology, emotional constancy plays an important role. Often it is those with authority who play the role of subordinates. They are vulnerable, defenseless and want to feel in need of care and care.
In practice they cannot display such an attitude. Therefore, role-playing games can help him realize his need for protection and care. By completely entrusting himself to others, the submissive becomes a “child.”
A ruler is not necessarily a dictator. BDSM is the ability to dominate within reason, without crossing the boundaries prohibited by the legislation of the Russian Federation. The beauty of such practices lies in the strict rules. It is necessary to observe safety measures and not use prohibited methods.
If we take Berne”s role theory into account, then people who rush back and forth between parent and child are prone to BDSM psychology. This behavior allows them to escape the oppressive hierarchy and realize the need for a role change.
There is nothing wrong with using BDSM techniques. The main thing is that they are voluntary. Any influence is allowed only with the permission of the partner. Therefore, thematic practices should not be confused with ordinary violence.
Sex in the back of the garage and “sitting face to face” instead of a thousand words — City of Sinners — Season 2 — Issue 2
