How do you explain your “unconventional” relationship to your friends?
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Being a caregiver isn’t always easy. Especially if you’re still a young student, or not even a student at all—just a high school freshman. Imagine this: You’ve been friends for over a year, so you understand each other perfectly. Now that you’ve found your sponsor, she understands (or senses) that you’re in a relationship.
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however, it’s not always possible to imagine your man as a friend. This is because he’s either married or against it. How do you explain this to your friend? Talk about what exactly makes you uncomfortable in your relationship.
Where to begin?
If it’s important to you to explain yourself to a friend who’s important to you in some way, tell her the truth. But at first, avoid unnecessary details. Tell her why you met the guy. But you still don’t understand how deep your relationship goes. If your friend is sincere, she won’t spread gossip and speculation about you. It will be smart and unobtrusive. By the way, this is a great opportunity to test your friends.
All my friends are in couples, but I’m at a loss…
Girls start dating and talking to guys. And you, it seems, are neither with guys nor single. This situation can seem awkward in a group. A “pop race” situation. Imagine that your friend, who decided to get married at the end of the year, went abroad for those same six months. What would you do?
Would you date everyone? No. Would you stay with them? Would you avoid that group? Also no. All the problems are in our heads. Explain that you’re having a good time single. However, if your friends start hiding boyfriends from you, it tarnishes your appearance and success. Do you need that?
I’m dependent on another person…
Sometimes friends don’t understand the changes in your demands. The host still adjusts to the sponsor’s schedule. I don’t know how to tell a true story. My girlfriend was a kept woman for a long time. For example, we go on vacation, to visit, and to the movies. I kept calling her apartment, but she changes all her plans and goes to her sponsor.
Read also: Woman with a child: the peculiarities of relationships in the “+1” formula
today there are so many free women with children that they have even ceased to surprise. And unlike the beauty of older generations, the “+1” of modern girls is not.
I remember this New Year. My friend really asked to meet him with me and insisted that she was very tired. 12 With no people around, her sponsor appears to be celebrating the holidays with his family and parents. Suddenly the phone and the girl fly towards him. I’m alone in her rented apartment with a huge plush table (built by her sponsor), hugging a martini box.
Karina Istomina: addiction, shame, exes, relationships with “friends”
Am I offended? First of all, yes. But then I realize that this is my friend’s choice. I have myself: to make this sacrifice so that I can eat good food and “take” the money without being alone or without being alone on vacation. And if I am now sitting with a bottle in my arms, then this is not my friend’s work, but mine.
How can I tell my friends about all this now? Yes, so be honest and upfront. You are not pregnant at all, and there is no need to let yourself down. Ease depends on the individual. And that’s not why. If you understand that she may let you down and not come to the meeting or, therefore, leave everything for the holidays, warn her in advance. Finally, you may depend not only on your sponsor, but also on your husband or parents.
Different levels
In our society, women are given dreams of marriage and children. And you want to escape poverty and see the world. Different levels of aspiration inevitably attract different companions. Let’s put things in order: why be ashamed of your true desires and why explain them? If your friend doesn’t understand them, then she won’t understand. If he accepts you for who you are, he will understand everything without words.
So what are the main mistakes you can make when dealing with all this? First, if the sponsor needs confidentiality, even the closest friend should not tell him about it. A careless statement can compromise him. Secondly, if you understand it by external changes (clothes, gadgets), then your friend will cast envious glances and will not explain anything.
This only tells your friend that she feels awkward. But overall, be honest, upfront and tell the truth. Then your friend will not only learn about your relationship style, but also understand why it is important to you. Therefore, he will not put you in an awkward position. Unless, of course, she’s your real girlfriend.
