Awkward silence in a conversation with a girl: what to do?
We are now in the 21st century garden. We communicate on any topic, intimate issues are not taboo, and sociability is preferable to hunting skills. But even today, nothing can replace real communication, especially between young men and women. And awkward silence with a girl can ruin all the pleasure from the process. All young people need to find out the reasons for this behavior and get rid of this shortcoming. Ultimately, this will help them experience the positive emotions of pleasant conversations and perhaps lay the foundation for more. In addition, successful dialogue has a very beneficial effect on self-esteem.
Contents of the article:
Reasons for awkwardness
Embarrassment in conversations with representatives of a particularly vulnerable sex is possible only in two cases: during a voice or video call by phone (messenger) or during a live conversation. However, since such a conversation took place, it means that the situation is much better than that of men who find it difficult to even meet a woman. In any case, the reasons for such situations are as follows:
- Unconfidence in one”s appearance and mental abilities.
- Excessively modest temperament and shyness.
The two qualities listed above are serious signs of an inadequate level of self-esteem or, even worse, the presence of a complex. Both must be eliminated by all available means.
- Lack of experience communicating with representatives of the fairer sex.
- Lack of initiative from the “other side”.
But in any case, with silence, the man begins to feel awkward. This creates additional uncertainty and prevents the brain from concentrating on creating interesting topics of conversation.
And in the rarest cases, the reason for this is the girl’s interest in the conversation, with an ordinary lack of common interests. Sometimes men clearly understand that their interests and knowledge cannot attract the attention of their interlocutor. Typically, such women have a rather narrow outlook and are not suitable as pleasant conversationalists.
Correcting bugs
In most cases, awkward silence with a girl does not cause the most pleasant feelings in a young man, so he needs to eliminate interfering factors. Wearing nice clothes, going to the gym and improving other aspects of his appearance can boost his self-confidence, but it”s wise to start with the psychological side of the problem — learning to communicate.
Then it’s worth starting with telephone conversations and switching to video communication (if the brain refuses to help the owner at all during the conversation). You need to gradually move from a call to a one-on-one dialogue.
Universal instructions
- It would be a good idea to think through the development of the conversation in advance. Especially good ideas are worth remembering or writing down. It is very good if a person knows the hobbies of the interlocutor. This is music, books, painting (yes, anything). The conversation should have a goal — an attempt to get to know the person better, talk about yourself, provide interesting information or get an opinion.
- Even if a person is very knowledgeable in many areas (cinema, art, history), you should not get too carried away and show the depth of your knowledge. Phrases should be of moderate length and relate only to the chosen goal. And you should only demonstrate your knowledge if the beauty herself asks you to talk to her about something that changes the topic of conversation.
- The ability to speak is very important. Much more important, however, is the ability to listen to your interlocutor. It is best to build a conversation in the form of a dialogue, rather than a monologue of the party. After each answer, the girl must answer: “Very interesting, I think.”, “But I think.”, “My opinion.”. This way, she will listen to what the young man has to say.
Read also: Why do girls like tall men and what should short guys do?
Many studies conducted in different countries indicate that in ancient centuries, women became old people. They always preferred.
At the first stage of the “internship,” the third point can be ignored. It is enough to raise interesting topics until the girl is “transported”. Absolutely all women love to talk, but only a small percentage knows how to listen correctly. Therefore, for the first time, it is worth giving the interlocutor the opportunity to say enough. This alleviates awkwardness and gives men a sense of beauty. The main thing is to draw a conclusion about the subject of the conversation.
- Silence is not a sign of disinterest or unwillingness to continue the conversation. If there is silence after your proposal, ask the woman: “What do you think.”, “Do you know.” etc., it is worth encouraging them to respond. It is also possible that the interlocutor does not know what to answer (and feels awkward himself). You can break awkward silences with girls with interesting questions that will make them think about beauty. Will she be an artist? — There are countless options.
How to Avoid Awkward Silences in Conversations (Craig Ferguson)
- Hear the correct answer. You need to listen to the words the woman is emphasizing, especially the situation she is describing. This will help you better understand the person”s worldview. However, don”t listen mindlessly. At the right moment, you need to nod, say an exclamation point, or shake your head as a sign of sympathy. During pauses, you can insert short comments, such as “yes” or “you”re right.” Every woman will pay such attention to her words.
During the conversation
With each new conversation a person gains life experience. This suggests that the girl is to some extent very similar to him (except for logic). They may become shy and try to continue the conversation.
During a conversation, it is very useful to pay attention to everything around you, not just the interlocutor (you can sit in the park, look at wildlife or other people and comment on what is happening at the right moment). An awkward pause can help break the silence. However, it is important not to get carried away here.
Gradually, you can move from neutral topics to light flirting. This is not an attempt to seduce a woman and get her into bed. This is a very pleasant form of communication between two people of different genders, which helps to get to know each other”s personalities better. Don”t admire unusual eyes and figure, it”s too ordinary. You can focus on your manicure (if you have one), beautiful hair and voice. Yes, you may even admire some of her answers.
If the silence is caused not by restraint on the part of the man, but by excessive tightness on the part of the girl, then the young man needs to first relax and make it clear that the situation does not bother him at all. Ideally, he can continue talking about something interesting. This gives him a reasonable amount of time to collect his thoughts and overcome his shyness.
There is a special form of communication between loved ones, friends or couples — it doesn’t matter. This is the so-called silence. This is not silence in which both interlocutors feel uncomfortable. Such silence shows that people are normal to each other, and causes real relaxation and sympathy, and not awkwardness, even without words. After all, we have all heard repeatedly that it is good to have a person who knows how to remain silent.
