How can a girl become confident? TOP 15 ways
Self-confidence plays a rather important role in the life of every person. Many important aspects of our daily lives depend on it. Proper self-esteem is equally important for both men and women. It’s just that this is often a problem in sex. Like refined natures, women are more likely than men to be prone to introspection, and more often than men, they worry about both external and internal shortcomings.
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And, as practice shows, the second girl literally knows from her own experience what it’s like to feel out of place. Moreover, this equally applies to those who do not have ideal external data and could just as easily pose for the cover of a glossy publication. Thus, it is not only about external beauty. More precisely, not at all. What kind of beast this is — “female insecurity”, and how to deal with it, is described below.
First, let”s “diagnose” the symptoms of self-poisoning.
Signs of low self-esteem
- Fashionable style. Insecure young women prefer dark, reserved modesty or gray and dull shades in their wardrobe. Thus, they subconsciously express the desire to disappear into the crowd and never attract attention to themselves. And, of course, no bright accessories in the form of stylish handbags or huge earrings.
- Eerie, quiet speech. The voice in some cases may change from a whisper to a scream. In most cases, the voice of an unbalanced girl can cause doubt in her own words. Naturally, such intonation is transmitted to her interlocutor.
- Confused expressions. People with low self-esteem rarely see their interlocutor in the eye. Most often, insecure people are characterized by a wandering gaze or a gaze directed at the floor.
- Awkward movements. Gestures are in a clumsy, mixed otic and disordered order. It seems that one’s own part of the body is interfering with an unbalanced person. All objects now tend to get out of control.
- Aggressive behavior. And the desire to humiliate especially vulnerable people.
- Closure and separation. An insecure girl will always prefer to spend the evening in splendid isolation rather than decide to enjoy the company of a noisy company.
- Even words, even thoughts are regularly tracked by negative particles. “I can’t”, “it’s not worth it”, “it won’t work”, in other words, very insidious phrases that clearly predict failure. Thus, a vicious circle is formed.
- Reluctance to take responsibility. Neither for your actions, nor for your words spoken. It”s easy for insecure girls to blame someone else for their failures.
- Manipulation through empathy. Insecure girls regularly resort to this method to feel a little more important. But we have bad news for her — this method does not work. Also, in this case you will not receive love, respect or recognition. The most you will achieve is what you asked for — pity.
Having discovered at least some of the above signs, you can safely sound the alarm. Unless, of course, you ruin your life with this destructive emotion.
Reasons for uncertainty
Speaking about the reasons for the girl’s low self-esteem, the psychologist came to the following conclusions:
- As a child, parents often compared their daughter with other children, thereby instilling in her an inferiority complex and developing self-doubt.
- While studying at school (institute), the girl had to go through several situations that undermined her self-confidence. Fellow s Derogatory remarks, especially from the opposite sex, can also cause insecurity.
Follow a few simple rules and you will definitely gain self-confidence.
15 Commandments of a Confident Girl
- Don”t try to fight doubts. Learn to live with them.
Fear and doubt are the constant companions of an insecure girl. And the more actively she tries to overcome them, the more they overcome her. Instead, the ideal is to acknowledge and realize that doubt is normal. It includes a unique ability. But where there is doubt, there is also faith. This means that they will again feel their own helplessness in this or that issue. It would be much more correct to find a motive to correct the situation.
And finally, eliminate the phrase “I can’t” from your vocabulary. Each of us has a certain talent. It is important to be able to find and develop them. Sit down and think carefully about the lessons that used to bring you joy. Maybe you paint beautiful pictures, dance beautifully, or write amazing poetry? Or maybe you haven”t run long distances? Do you remember? Perfect! It”s time to develop your long-term focusing skills. Not least to proudly declare: “I can do this!” And you shouldn”t openly demonstrate your skills.
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- Find people who need you.
Surely there are such people in your circle. You didn”t dare think about it because of your insecurity: you”re not sure that you can find the people who need you. For example, it could be an elderly neighbor upstairs who you regularly help with shopping. The neighbor boy whom you teach to play the piano. Yes, even the postman whose front door you open once a week. It doesn”t matter who it is. Your sense of self-importance is what matters.
- Visualize your ideal image of yourself.
Let your imagination be bold! In the future, imagine yourself in the smallest detail, from appearance to character traits. Fall in love with your new look and remember the feeling this exercise gave you. The more often you scroll through your ideal image in your head, the more often your dreams will come true.
Of course, at first this phrase only causes panic in an insecure girl. But over time you will see for yourself the opposite. No, we do not encourage you to rush up to passers-by and ask them to evaluate your appearance and talents. It will be enough that you do not look away embarrassedly at the beginning of your transformation. Ask a nice man how to get to the nearest metro station, if you are not afraid. With small but confident steps, begin to approach your goal.
- Pay attention to yourself.
In addition, it is much easier for girls to do this. Don”t be afraid to radically change your wardrobe, change your hair color or wear bright lipstick. Your self-esteem will only benefit from this.
- Play sports.
Sport is a complete distraction and discipline. Moreover, thanks to it you can significantly change these indicators. And this will only benefit girls suffering from low self-esteem.
- Don”t make the mistake of being old.
Believe me, there is not a single person on earth who does not make mistakes. And you are no exception. Be philosophical about your mistakes and look at them from a different angle. Yes, it happened, yes, it is unpleasant. But now you know exactly what to do to avoid repeating the sad experience. And yes, we may be victims of circumstances, but what happened is absolutely not our fault. Please know this.
Learn to be aware of it, even if it is small. Your achievements should definitely be a reason to be proud. Feel free to have a “magic” notebook in which you can freely write down your achievements, big and small, but nothing extra.
- Don”t run away from problems.
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- Have and express your opinion.
This commandment flows smoothly from the previous one. Don”t be afraid to say what you really think. Make it a habit to express your needs or express your dissatisfaction with certain behaviors. You may be surprised to learn that the people around us cannot read our minds. That”s why it”s so important to say out loud what you don”t like at all or what you”re not willing to put up with. Important — first of all, for your own good!
- Choose your social circle carefully.
Once you do this, you will benefit from saying goodbye to anyone who makes you feel negative or undermines your confidence. Communication should bring joy, not depression. Therefore, do not be afraid to refuse to communicate with people who make you feel negative. Expand your circle of acquaintances and meet interesting people.
Self-doubt often manifests itself in the form of depression and neuroses. Girls with low self-esteem cry quickly, even for insignificant reasons. And we need to fight this. By the way, as soon as you feel that the offense is not always justified, begin to rise, and then hastily retreat. Or, as experienced psychologists advise, take a deep breath and count to ten. Try to focus only on positive emotions.
- Ask yourself questions often.
And be sure to find the answers to them. During these fascinating conversations with your inner self, you will begin to piece together the reasons for your unstable behavior. And make sure that most of them are simply unnatural. Are you afraid to go to your next interview? Ask yourself the question “why?” Avoid a romantic date with a cute guy? What scares you so much? Scroll through the possible answers in your head, and you will be surprised at how groundless and ridiculous your fears are.
This is the last item on the list, but the first in importance. Don”t stop, develop and become better every day. First of all, for yourself. Don”t expect praise or approval from strangers. Stop doubting your success. Don”t feel self-doubt. Be proud of yourself and love yourself. And the rest will follow!
Practical exercises
Today there are many courses and trainings that promise that your self-esteem will skyrocket literally by the second lesson. Whether to use their services or not is your choice. There is no doubt that this is a useful skill and necessary practice. However, there are some simple exercises that you can easily do on your own in the comfort of your home.
- “Distribution coats.”
Think of your insecurities as an old, worn coat. Imagine that, on top of everything else, it doesn’t compress well and cannot fill your chest. You think you”re comfortable with him and your style, but you realize it”s time to get rid of him. Imagine in great detail how you will take it off, straighten your shoulders and free yourself from the oppression that has been imposed on you for so long. Throw it away, but it”s better to burn it. There is nothing stopping you from moving forward now. Nothing prevents you from moving. Nothing stops you from updating your wardrobe and buying things that fit you perfectly. It changes and highlights your strengths.
- “Perfect face
Stand in front of the mirror, close your eyes and remember the happiest moments of your life. The one you always remember with a smile on your face. Open up with sincere and genuine emotions. Open your eyes and look carefully at your reflection. Memorize it in great detail and repeat it every time you are not perfect and something seems wrong to you. Only then will you understand how wrong you are.
