Friendship between a man and a woman: how real is it?
t?
Can a normal heterosexual man and woman be friends? In response to this question, you will probably hear dozens of sideways jokes, several proverbs and several examples from the personal experience of the interlocutors. Not to mention the numerous films and books on this topic.
Contents of the article:
Yes, most men and women live comfortably side by side, work and go shopping together. But what if it’s all just a sham, and these people are forced to hide their wild sexual desires throughout their torn apart lives?
Scientists say this is partly true. We can really be friends with each other, but the opportunity to start a relationship with a person of the opposite sex can manifest itself in all its glory when people do not expect this very friendship and always turn a blind eye to this friendship.
How did scientists come to such conclusions?
To get to the bottom of the matter, the researchers, in typical fashion, selected 88 pairs of opposite-sex friends from college students and locked them in a laboratory.
Each friend was asked questions about their feelings towards each other. Of course, confidentiality was guaranteed to obtain honest answers. Indeed, it is unlikely that anyone will want to talk about their feelings if your friends later find out about them and find out that they do not reciprocate.
In addition to the usual protocols used in such studies, both participants verbally agreed not to discuss the study after its completion. It is not known whether the scientists resorted to extremes — they cursed in small expectations, perhaps they believed that words were enough for them. The friends were then asked about their romantic feelings.
The results showed significant differences in how men and women viewed friendships with members of the opposite sex. It has been found that men are more attracted to their girlfriends. Men also often thought they were attracted to their girlfriend”s romantic feelings.
In most cases, it turned out that men”s opinions about how attractive he was to his girlfriends were based on nothing other than a desire to build a relationship with this woman.
Men assumed that if for some reason they themselves experienced some kind of romantic attraction, then women must feel the same way. For women, the opposite was true. Women generally weren”t attracted to women and believed the attraction was mutual. In other words, men overestimate their level of attractiveness, while women underestimate it.
Men were also more willing to take risks in romantic relationships with friends.
However, whether their friends were currently in a relationship didn”t matter to either women or men when it came to determining their level of attraction. However, men in such situations were willing to go on romantic dates with their girlfriends, regardless of their current relationships. Women, on the other hand, generally didn”t even consider this possibility.
Read also: Do ideal relationships between men and women exist in real life?
The idea of a strong, happy, healthy, and ideal relationship and the concept of an ideal relationship are often confusing and misinterpreted. This is not.
Overall, the study shows that men find it difficult to just be friends. Keep in mind the nature of the study itself: respondents weren”t asked about abstract or potential friends, but about a very specific person, confined to the confines of a single laboratory.
This, to a certain extent, confirms the stereotype of somewhat naive women and men ready to have sex at any time, and also proves that different people experience the same relationships very differently.
For men, friendships with the opposite sex are another opportunity for new romantic relationships. However, women often view friendships with men as purely platonic. Friendship.”> Does friendship exist between a man and a woman? #shorts #friendship #relationships #smeet_rasulov
And here again, there are differences between men and women. Women tend to view romantic attraction to a friend as negative, while men tend to view it as positive. Incidentally, older men are more likely to benefit from romantic relationships with friends.
Taking these two studies together, we can say that women are convinced that it”s truly possible to have a platonic friendship with a man, while men can”t resist the urge to turn friendship into something more. And the older men get, the harder it is to overcome this need.
Some Practical Advice
Some practical advice
Understand that different people want different things. It”s normal for people to be selfish. It”s also normal to believe that our desires are universal and applicable to everyone. Remember that the desires of the person you”re in a relationship with, even as a friend, can be radically different from yours. Even the reasons people become friends can be different. Some people need companionship, others financial support. Some need sex, and others affection. If you want to be friends with them, you must respect their goals. Don”t be ashamed of other people”s desires.
- Don”t be afraid to speak your intentions out loud. Otherwise, it will only lead to disappointment and anger towards your friend. Don”t be afraid to talk to your friends, share your concerns and desires, ask questions, and be yourself. Clearly define what is and isn”t possible within your friendship.
- Be honest with each other. Some people, when starting a friendship with someone of the opposite sex, hope that sooner or later it will develop into something more. Some people believe that friendship isn”t an excuse to give up sexual pleasure. Others simply need support and the opportunity to talk.
- And if both parties are intentionally honest from the start, all three options can form a good foundation for a friendship with someone of the opposite sex.
However, whether you want something more from the friendship is a completely different matter, and whether it”s sex or a serious relationship doesn”t matter if your friend doesn”t share that desire. In this case, don”t console yourself with the hope that everything will change, including this person”s opinion. Don”t torture yourself needlessly. It”s better to ruin such a friendship from the start. Don”t waste time and money on something that”s not meant to be.
So, can women and men be friends? In most cases, no. Sometimes it”s just a step toward a romantic relationship or sex. And sometimes friendship is impossible. Because only one of your friends wants something more.
The only option is to find someone whose friendship goals align with yours and be honest from the start. And judging by the research, friendship between the sexes only becomes a reality if everyone thinks like a woman. And if everyone starts thinking like a man, then maybe, just maybe, the world will soon face serious overpopulation.
Is friendship between a man and a woman possible? A psychologist and sexologist”s opinion. Tatyana Slavina
