The Psychology of Open Relationships between a Man and a Woman
Family psychologist. For eight years, I”ve been saving “family units” from corruption. I help couples rediscover love and mutual understanding.
Contents of the article:
When you no longer have to hide your physiological needs, we can freely talk about them. There are no longer classic relationships between partners. This shouldn”t be shyness. This includes open relationships, which will be discussed later. In short, open relationships are relationships built without any kind of commitment on either side. In such relationships, there are no demands on the partner, the partner, or the partner in general. In principle, open relationships are defined differently by each couple. The boundaries are initially set for everyone. However, as a rule, they all have something in common. They imply freedom in expressing affection, courtship, and brief intimate moments with others. Such relationships are often pursued by people with an aggressive sexual stance. This is unsurprising, as the most common reason for this is that people aren”t always ready to be faithful to each other. Because there”s no question of fidelity and devotion to just one person (possibly one who doesn”t satisfy all the needs of the other), people who choose independent, open relationships usually never influence their existing partners, which suggests that this doesn”t lead to a breakup. Such couples don”t limit either their partners or themselves, don”t force themselves into the confines of “normality,” but prefer to get everything they want without demanding or asking their partner for it. In other words, such a union is a kind of legal betrayal. Often associated with open relationships are:
- Childless couples
- Couples with high sexual activity
- People who prefer sex and a variety of partners
- People who crave intense emotions
Etc. Only those who know how to trust and forgive are capable of such relationships. People who want to enjoy every day of life without being burdened by the usual moral boundaries imposed by society.
How to understand what an open relationship is?
In fact, when we talk about open relationships, there are no special rules. These are couples who combine a common life, sex life and other things usually associated with a standard couple, and have the right only to flirt, courtship or intimacy with someone else. And this is not a reason for scandal or disagreement, as was previously discussed by both parties. However, this type of relationship is only suitable for those who:
- Can tolerate betrayal.
- Want to stay connected with one partner despite the other partner
- Fairly open in the second half of the relationship
- Psychologically stable
- Is not possessive and does not suffer from jealousy
- Wants to experience pure emotions
The disadvantage of this type of relationship is that the boundaries are too blurred. Each couple understands different things and persons by these terms. To ensure that everything goes smoothly and there is no risk to the relationship, it is worth discussing in advance how it will go and writing down a variety of situations that may arise. For example, it often happens that a fleeting intrigue develops into passionate love. This, of course, underlies the existing relationship.
Read also: Is there an ideal relationship between a man and a woman in real life? the idea of a strong, happy, healthy and ideal relationship and the concept of a perfect relationship is often confusing and misinterpreted. It”s not.
To avoid a recurrence of such events, be prepared:
- Discuss meetings.
Some couples have a rule against having sex with the same person more than once. This is very acceptable because one sexual encounter can lead to something really serious that kills the relationship.
- Security control.
In other words, a means to protect and screen STSP disease partners. This is understandable, because no one wants intimate problems due to unsuccessful subplots. Discuss in advance how the meeting will be organized. Are walks and phone calls possible or will everything be limited only to proximity.
If a partner is reluctant to discuss such issues, they may simply be using or keeping them as a fallback option. This often happens because the partner may not want to discuss the issue with their partner. Therefore, it is better to be wary if everyone can be heard live, since everyone wants to be heard.
Causes of open relationships
In fact, there are much deeper motives behind this concept than the usual motivations for bonding.
- Fear of responsibility.
This happens when there”s a lack of confidence in your partner and their feelings. However, this is normal. Because no one can guarantee eternal love and a life without arguments and difficulties. Even after a stamp in the passport, there are no guarantees.
- Difficult breakups.
For some people, ideas about future open relationships, about restoration and “recovery” from previous difficult relationships exist. After a breakup, there”s a need for the warmth of a loved one, but not the desire and intensity of new emotions. I don”t want to build new emotional connections. It can be painful. If your partner honestly admits this, they should challenge the OLD to be frank. However, it”s hard to disagree that being a transit point isn”t all that convenient. Furthermore, there”s no guarantee that after “recovery,” they won”t be consigned to the trash heap.
- Unwillingness to change the familiar foundation of life
By a certain age, everyone develops many habits that are very difficult to break. With the emergence of a serious relationship, one must adapt to one”s partner, take their opinions into account, and give up certain things entirely. Many people find this leveling unacceptable and opt for open relationships.
- Low self-esteem.
This can be the result of psychological trauma in childhood or occur as a consequence of a difficult breakup. However, a person faces numerous complications, and they try their best to restrain themselves, looking for more or less simple options. For example, as soon as a partner starts talking about a monotonous sex life and its routine, after a breakup, a person tries to prove to themselves that this is not the case.
Variations in the development of open relationships
There are only two paths to the development of such relationships: strong and unstable. The first means that when a couple tries to capture their relationship in the way they would like to remember it, an option is possible, but, as a rule, this is rarely obvious. Some quickly trust themselves or find landmarks that lead them along the path of standard family life. And when this happens, a scandal ensues, inevitably followed by a breakup. The second option is increasingly colorful. Perhaps the relationship falls into the category of serious commitment. This occurs when both partners trust each other completely. This means that feelings are not so strong and there is no need to fear that everything will fall apart at any moment.
Of course, for those who prefer variety, lovers of freedom, non-existence, multifaceted sexual life — the idea of an open relationship can be a good option for securing the status of a “life principle”. However, it is worth understanding that only those units that can do this can do this. If there are people who never want to lose and agree to such conditions, it is worth preparing for the fact that sooner or later various relationships or these expensive connections will end.
