6 reasons why you don’t want sex with a guy even if you’re in love

I want sex with a guy.“I don’t want my man” — contrary to the opinion of girls that their case is unique, this phrase can often be heard in psychologists’ offices. Many women genuinely don”t understand why you don”t want sex despite your partner”s passionate love. Without delving into the deep psychological reasons, girls begin to delve into themselves and collect much more boring diagnoses.

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Scientifically irrational “self-diagnosis” leads to secondary psychological problems. This is due to the lack of sex education and the widespread stereotype that sex and having a partner of the right age is all that is required for sex.

External reasons for lack of desire

“Do you want sex in general or especially with your boyfriend?” — The first question to ask anyone who complains of lack of sexual desire. From the answers it will become clear where to look for the reasons and how to eliminate them. External factors are those that do not depend on the girl herself and are not directly related to her sex life (that is, she did not specifically program herself to exclude gender from her life).

  • Fatigue and stress

These are the most common causes of sluggish sex life. Under stress, the body produces the hormones triiodothyronine and thyroxine, which do not contribute to a predisposition to relaxation and intimacy. They block sexual activity and cause chronic fatigue. In addition, the girl cannot look for her terrible diagnosis on her own. Why does she work 12 hours a day and doesn”t want sex? Chronic fatigue not only greatly dulls cognitive activity (lack of erotic fantasies), but also greatly dulls the desire to move again.

  • Tension in relationships

Another powerful factor in reducing female libido is tension in relationships with a partner. When there is misunderstanding, silence and unspoken insistence, intimacy turns into real torture that you want to avoid. You feel a lack of trust in the person, and unconsciously the woman moves away from a relationship in which she feels like a fisherman. Tension increases if a man has ever flirted with another girl or wants to. Feelings of jealousy and mistrust cause serious cracks in relationships, in which the sexual sphere always suffers.

  • The guy”s appearance

Almost as important a factor in determining a woman”s sexual attractiveness. Untidyness and lack of understanding of basic hygiene rules can not only alienate a partner, but also put an end to the relationship. In addition, some time after the start of a relationship, a man neglects himself, stops watching his diet and going to the gym. Factors that control the behavior and desires of women not only in the sexual sphere, but in general. When the body adjusts to a new diet, all vital systems are “rebooted”. This in itself is a serious stress for the body. In this state, thoughts about sex take last place.

Read also: 10 possible reasons why a guy hasn”t had sex for a long time why did an impressive, tall, sexy man take so long to have sex? The superficial answer is that it’s all about his lifestyle. And in the article What.

Having sex during treatment is not advisable, even if you really love this person, of course. In a state of depression, the body spends energy on recovery. Perhaps he lacks biologically active substances to initiate the process of sexual activity. In this case, in any case, you cannot blame yourself if you do not have the desire to have sex.

The underlying reason is sexual aversion

A woman’s aversion to attempts at sexual contact with a regular partner and avoidance of intimacy under pretexts is a manifestation of psychogenic coldness, which the girl most often does not even suspect. On a subconscious level, she simply puts off solving the problem, looking for excuses and eliminating the root of the problem.

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Such feelings can arise as a result of a woman”s prolonged exposure to unfavorable conditions associated with her partner. However, she is sexually attracted to other men. Sexual disgust is expressed in the avoidance of not only sex, but also manifestations of tender feelings. Gradually, kisses, hugs and conversational feelings disappear from the relationship. Often a woman feels guilty and does not withdraw and does not make contact due to the fact that she unconsciously punishes herself for the lack of sex. For example, the interlocutor repeatedly emphasized the girl’s external shortcomings (too thin and crooked legs, correct facial features, but inappropriate behavior). Recognizing one”s shortcomings causes the emergence and development of feelings of guilt. The woman is so imbued with the man’s comments that she begins to believe in her inferiority. Having lost self-confidence, a woman does not consider herself worthy to enjoy sex (“sex is beautiful, but not for me”). Cultivating this belief is a direct path to psychogenic compaction.

  • The physiological reasons for the extinction of a girl’s sexual energy are those defects that she herself finds in her body. Often a partner helps to find such defects. He may make fun of the structure of some organ, the tendency to have a quick or prolonged orgasm, or his reluctance to have sex in positions that his partner likes.
  • Psychological — the second group of reasons why you don’t want sex with your loved one. They may lie in a woman’s deepest attitudes. For example, it is difficult for her to relax because the fear that the guy will disappear after sex lives in her head. Perhaps a previous sexual experience caused emotional pain, and now the girl is subconsciously distancing herself from the man she loves, fearing a repetition of the scenario.

A common cause of diminished female sexual energy is the fear of pregnancy. Fear of pregnancy can stem from a variety of factors, including being alone with a child, losing one”s figure, experiencing another unsuccessful pregnancy, or a difficult birth. Wanting to avoid a repeat of this unpleasant situation, a woman begins to believe that sex is not for her. This question can be answered affirmatively if treatment is available. However, the solution to sexual dysfunction depends on the underlying causes. Typically, work should begin with eliminating the sexual façade while maintaining self-respect. A good psychologist can help you understand your true desires and uncover the deep-seated beliefs that prevent you from living on the surface. Sometimes external factors can interfere psychologically. In any case, if a woman no longer feels sexual attraction to her beloved man, this issue should be openly discussed. Increased sexual energy only occurs when a woman feels completely safe. Forced sex or insufficient intimacy is a warning sign of sexual boundaries being violated. To cope with emotional and physical discomfort, they must stop scaring themselves and hiding the problem from men. They also need to understand that to resolve relationship problems, it”s important to stop trying to change their partner and work on themselves.

I don”t want sex.

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