Bad Sex — How to Tell if Intimacy Wasn”t Worth It
Here are 20 signs you”re having sex with someone who could be replaced by an adult toy. Absolutely nothing will change. Don”t waste time on lengthy introductions; get straight to the fun part.
20 Signs of Bad Sex
- Your partner expects you to please them, but they won”t reciprocate.
Of course, doing something pleasurable for another person is interesting and intriguing, but only if it”s mutual. If your partner is only interested in making you feel good and doesn”t care much about your feelings and emotions, this is the most obvious sign of poor intimacy. Especially if this happens consistently. Believe me, no matter the reason someone is indifferent to your pleasure—simple laziness or a lack of compassion—this is no excuse for using you as a tool for sexual release. Sex is an interaction, a dialogue. Always.
- Your partner achieves orgasm, but you don”t. It”s truly wonderful when your partner climaxes every time you have sex. But can you do the same? If you often (or constantly) struggle to reach orgasm and nothing changes in your sex life, you”re having bad sex. This may be bad for your partner because intimacy only means their orgasm. They engage in sexual contact with you solely to climax, and nothing else matters. Well, there are countless toys that are better at achieving orgasm than such a partner, obviously. Maybe you should consider changing something (or someone)?
Is your partner impatient or pressuring you?
- If it takes you more than five minutes to reach climax, your partner will think there”s something wrong with you. It sounds terrible, but after such caustic remarks, some people start thinking seriously about their sexuality and are convinced there”s a problem. Don”t listen to this nonsense! Take five minutes, ten minutes, or even an hour. You are unique, and your body functions at its own pace. If it takes you longer to climax, that”s normal. Don”t try to change anything. Or rather, something needs to change—perhaps your partner.
Sex is like a pornographic plot.
- We”ve long since learned that pornography is often more of an enemy than a friend. It gives people, especially men, false ideas about sex. In real life, sex ends when both parties are satisfied. Again: both. It”s entirely possible that your partner mistakenly believes it”s supposed to be a pornographic scenario, where the woman acts like a sex robot.
There”s no foreplay in your sex.
- Your partner simply lies on the bed, waiting for you to pounce and do everything yourself. Foreplay is essential because it initiates arousal in a woman”s body and is responsible for the natural production of lubrication. Needless to say, penetration without foreplay can even be painful.
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How do I know if a man enjoyed sex with me? It”s very frustrating when a man courts you for a long time, only to disappear after the first time and refuse to continue the conversation. Perhaps he”s simply had enough your partner will point out your shortcomings. They may comment on your body hair, which you haven”t had time to notice (or simply didn”t want to). Spots and wrinkles may be noticeable—either way, it”s abnormal or unacceptable.
- Such people are typically slow to point out their unshaven pubic hair or other body features. Again, you should consider a good vibrator. At least you”ll be calm and undistracted by its appearance.
Your partner won”t warn you when they”re finished.
Then they ejaculate in your mouth. Or on your breasts. Or with their eyes. Contrary to popular belief, not everyone enjoys this. Doing so is disrespectful to your partner.
- They insist on unprotected sex.
Perhaps there”s no need to comment on this. Unprotected sex carries a risk of pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. Contraception is necessary. Besides, if your partner pressures you to have sex without a condom, who knows what they”ll push you to do next?
- They refuse to spend time with you.
If your partner is commitment-phobic and isn”t there even when you need them, believe me, that kind of sex isn”t worth the effort. In this case, no matter how hard you try, sex won”t work. Especially if it happens regularly. What”s so interesting about wild movements and the smell of alcohol during sex?
- They”ll always take care of what you want.
And when you actually talk to him about being ready for sex, he”s not interested in spending time with you, preferring to stroke your hair or watch Batman on the couch. He won”t ask how your day was or try to learn anything about your life. His interest in you is limited to staring at your naked body. Few people want to be a faceless Dutch wife, right?
- He doesn”t practice good personal hygiene.
For example, there”s a certain type of person who doesn”t consider it necessary to shower after the gym or use antiperspirant. Or, out of laziness, they might skip the shower altogether. However, as a rule, it”s these partners who expect a shower, fresh hair, makeup, and the scent of flowers and happiness. If all of the above applies to you, consider whether it”s worth cleaning up for someone who doesn”t clean up for you.
- Stale bed linens.
You have a distinct feeling that your partner hasn”t changed their bed linens since the Second Coming. You can also have a confidential conversation about choosing bedding, especially dark ones, as they”re less likely to stain.
- Your partner makes hurtful comments about you.
Of course, if they insult you, even jokingly, it”s a clear sign that you need to cut ties with them. However, if your partner insults you and says something that still hurts you, don”t ignore it. Even seemingly innocuous comments about pigtails or underwear styles can affect your self-esteem.
- They don”t know how to please you.
Perhaps there”s a lack of knowledge about female anatomy and a resistance to learning it. Simply put, your partner can”t even locate your clitoris and can”t stimulate it properly. If you feel that for any reason you don”t want to continue intercourse and tell your partner so, at best, they”ll ask you to achieve orgasm another way, and at worst, they”ll simply ignore your words. And he doesn”t care if you”re tired, hurt, or uncomfortable.
- Your partner insists on things you don”t want.
Threesomes, anal sex, sex during your period—any sex that doesn”t interest you. Even if you”ve already made it clear several times that you don”t intend to do it. This only shows that, as in all the previous cases, the person perceives you as a series of holes into which he can insert his penis.
- He”s never hugged you.
Again, this is an evasion of responsibility. Your partner fears spiritual intimacy and abstains even from unnecessary contact, using their body only when sexual release is needed.
- They don”t compliment you.
Your partner will never tell you how good you look. They won”t congratulate you on your achievements at work or in other areas of your life. Needless to say, this is insulting and will eventually discourage sexual desire.
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