How to achieve quality sex life in marriage?
There is a myth that sex in marriage gets worse over time. Jokes and comedy series talk about this; this is considered a valid reason for a husband to have a mistress. In fact, not everything is as it seems. Sex should get better over time as couples get to know and understand each other better and know how to please each other in bed. And in this article you will learn how to make sex in marriage truly wonderful.
Contents of the article:
How to understand that you are already doing well
So, to prepare for “great marital sex even after years of marriage,” you need to:
- Accept each other”s flaws and quirks. People are not fresh and stable all their lives, they change, but this is not a problem.
- Dating, fun and playfulness. Of course, in the harsh Russian reality this seems like a fantasy. Life, children, work, trying to relax, dating and playfulness seem to remain distant students. But you have to try. If you don”t, marriage will consume your life.
- You are physically attractive to each other.
- You can communicate productively and meaningfully and speak openly about your preferences and desires.
- You are ready to make time for each other.
- I. you love each other. Your feelings may have changed since you met, but they are still there and will not disappear.
What to do to have a healthy sex life in marriage
- First: communicate.
JJ Vazhappilly (no, not a spell to summon Satan, but a Filipino surname) conducted a study and found a direct correlation between how couples rate their satisfaction with their marital sex life and how often they talk. This is not an everyday conversation. Talk about sexual fantasies, likes and dislikes, previous sexual experiences, new things, and things they would like to change.
- Second, share your hopes and expectations.
This logically follows from the previous paragraph. It”s about articulating what you want from sex, what you expect, and what it”s all about for you. Do you just want to relax, cuddle and feel good in bed after a nice physical activity? Or you want sex to be special, tender and romantic, for example, in a special atmosphere with rose petals and candles. And if you want to shake up your sex life with some experimentation, add something a little more extreme. It”s also important to talk about your partner”s expectations of you. Are you happy with everything? Maybe you want him to be kinder to you and listen more carefully to your reactions? Or do you think he/she lacks release? Rigidity? If you don”t tell him about it, he won”t know about it.
The novelty of being recently engaged to a new sexual partner can be truly intoxicating. However, long-term partnerships have the added benefit of allowing you to explore new aspects of sexuality together. What happens if your partner suddenly shows a dominant or unexpectedly tender and soft side? It is this completely new and increasingly deeper perception of each other that gives marital sex a special appeal.
- Third: It creates expectations.
Read also: 5 problematic situations in the sexual life of men and their solutions during their life, every person has encountered sexual problems at least once. They can be caused by overload, health difficulties,.
In marriage, there is usually no room for spontaneous sex. What is spontaneity if the children are about to return from school? (or grandchildren. If the grandchildren deserve applause!). This is usually perceived as something bad that kills romance and passion. But try to look at it differently. Yes, you know you are having sex. But it”s great! You have planned a pleasant pastime, a moment of sensual intimacy with your loved one, what could be better? Make your partner sweat with anticipation. For example, start foreplay in the morning, but don”t finish, let the imperfections stimulate your mind and enliven your impatience throughout the day.
Send erotic messages to each other, talk to your husband on the phone and whisper erotic fantasies. And in the evening, after still closeness, hugs, kisses, love and care for each other, adding a little tenderness, cocoa and anticipation, sex itself turns from mechanical friction into a long-awaited welcome.
- Fourth: it”s not just about sex.
Sex does not exist in a vacuum, it is part of the marital system. For example, it is closely related to the level of tactile contact and romantic expressions of affection. Your marital sex will be more frequent, healthy and comfortable if you pay attention to things like holding hands, hugging, kissing, hair hugging, hair hugging, ironing, touching, kissing. If you have sex three times a week, and the rest of the time you live as neighbors in a shared apartment, then this is not just satisfaction of sexual needs, but also a feeling of sexual intimacy. Another, if you want, and don”t make love.
- Fifth: Healthcare.
Turn up the heat! secrets of passionate sex in marriage Kevin Lehman
- Number 6: Find out what makes your loved one feel loved by their partner.
Much has already been said about the importance of talking about sex. But you can (and should) also talk about what makes your partner feel loved, not just technical parameters like “softer/harder” or “faster/slower.” You probably know the concept of the Five Love Languages.
In short, we all express love in different ways. The one who wants to express it speaks about it out loud, says compliments and recognition. Some people give a gift, some people express love through touch. Ask your partner in those moments when he feels most loved and desired. This gives him special pleasure. And he will do it for you.
- Seventh: Don”t compare.
There are no rules for sex. What matters is whether you”re satisfied with your sex life, not how often, how long, or how many times a week. And remember that real life is not a movie. Not every sex act will be a star in your eyes, and not every date will be like a romantic movie.
- Eighth and last: ask for help if you need it.
Sometimes sexual problems can be solved simply by going to the doctor once. For example, perhaps the husband has problems with potency or the wife has vaginal dryness (especially after the birth of a child).
If you have problems with sexual health, do not hesitate to consult a specialist. If problems in family life or sex persist for a long time and cannot be solved, you may need to see a sexologist or psychotherapist. It”s up to you to decide whether an active sex life in marriage is great.
