Relationships for the sake of sex: basic rules of erotic friendship
“He defined it with the term “erotic friendship.” He convinced his lovers: only relationships in which there is no trace of emotion and in which one partner does not encroach on the life and freedom of the other can bring happiness to both.”
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From the novel “The Unbearable Lightness of Being” (Milan Kunder).
Another way to put it is: sex without commitment, erotic friendships sometimes use the vulgar “friendship body.” The essence is the same — these are relationships for people who do not need relationships. The ease of meetings, commitments and more is what people usually try to create and maintain such connections for. However, open relationships have their own rules that cannot be broken. Otherwise, there is a chance to immediately fall into the trap of unpleasant feelings and disappointed expectations.
A categorical “No!”: what you can’t do in a relationship without commitment
The good news is that no-strings-attached sex doesn”t owe anything to anyone. Future plans should be abandoned immediately, even if they only include weekend plans. We shouldn”t talk about the longer term.
The freedom of partners cannot be limited. Regardless of whether other partners are present at the meeting, you cannot ask where free time will be spent. Do not call in the evening, early morning or on weekends. Do not impose your company and do not insist on meetings.
There is no jealousy in an open relationship. When agreeing to sex, you must understand that sex is not just about one partner. This happens because when they want to have sex with one person, they begin to build a completely different planned relationship.
Therefore, safety must come first. Sex without condoms, to exclude infectious diseases and the mandatory use of birth control pills during sexual intercourse, is not a mandatory regular medical examination. Even if the partner assures that he is absolutely healthy. Trust a person who does not consider the relationship permanent.
Ease and comfort: what will make relationships for sex truly enjoyable
Absence of relatives, parents, friends or children in the sphere of communication. Unlike regular romantic relationships, relationships for sex do not involve “getting to know the parent.”
Read also: Basic rules of sex without commitment: how not to go beyond what is permitted
You are not ready for a serious relationship or your previous relationship recently ended and you need time to recover emotionally. Sex without.
Film “Sex for Friendship”.
The equation “meeting = sex” should immediately exclude romance. Somewhere breakfast and dinner are an honest conversation. This saves, firstly, time, money and mental strength. Secondly, as soon as joint leisure begins, it is a completely different relationship and expectation. In general, it is better to follow the Golden Rule.
Discussing life and pressing issues is honest conversations. They must not be in a sexual relationship. This does not mean that you should remain silent throughout the meeting. You can talk, but only about what is happening here. You can discuss your expectations from the meeting and your impressions of what has already happened. You can talk about your partner”s character, weather and appearance. However, it is important to avoid all “serious” topics that could somehow exhaust each participant.
4 female rules to avoid getting into a “friends + sex” relationship.
In addition to the previous point, it is important to maintain a diversity of partners. Several constants may be observed. One is permanent, others can be added arbitrarily. This is necessary in order not to “focus” on one person until the attachment has gone far.
Moreover, this is not a call for casual relationships. As you know, it doesn”t get any better. This is just a recommendation. If you have a desire for intimacy with other people, don”t limit yourself. Ultimately, it”s about preserving your ability to diversify your sex life, and the relationship will be maintained without commitment.
Also, don”t pick your friends! If a girl slept with her best friend and decided to continue in the same spirit without obligations, you should think about your decision several times!
Caution: love!
Despite all the recommendations and precautions, did you experience mild sensations? “Tricks! It”s good to fall in love” (E. Schwartz, “Ordinary Miracles”). Let”s consider this fact from a philosophical point of view. But what to do, for example, with the feeling of being close to a loved one and the thirst for life? There are exactly two options: if the partner is against the category, try to achieve reciprocity or end the relationship altogether.
If a partner does not want to change the agreement and does not want to build a relationship with one person, it is important not to prolong the relationship or continue it. There is a danger of falling into the trap of love dependence (addiction) and taking a long time to get rid of it under the supervision of a specialist.
