Why doesn”t my boyfriend want sex and what should I do?
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If a girl refuses to “have a cup of tea” or “look at her stamp collection,” a man will firmly accept such answers (although not all). But if a man doesn’t want to have sex, it seems illogical and strange to the girl. How about this: The “predator” is offered his prey on a silver platter, but he doesn”t want it. In fact, the situation is not conducive to humor, since such pictures have a sharp negative impact on women’s self-esteem. And in most cases, the very fact of a negative answer indicates that young people have certain problems.
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Just a few years ago, there were rumors that men were sex objects and women did everything they could to avoid marital obligations. The emphasis has changed and hard sex has become more “intoxicating”. Statistics show that more than 60% of the planet”s male representatives are increasingly refusing to play in bed, and 40% have sex only once a week. These are the results of an anonymous survey on social networks Research.
Main reasons for failures
The fact that everyone is different has been mentioned many times. Some people like coffee with cream, some don”t, and some people can”t stand it at all. Additionally, some people need sex at least once a day (preferably two or three times), while others need sex several times a week. If a man does not want to have sex, first of all you should pay attention to the frequency of intimate contacts. If a girl is hyperactive, but her loved one is not, there is no need to look for reasons. They just have different temperaments.
It’s another matter if sexual activity in a relationship sharply decreases. First, concerned women need to pay attention to several important factors.
- Workaholism is incompatible with sexaholism.
Very few men can boast of an optimal workplace. Men sit in the office, they lack fresh air and physical activity. The latter reduces the activity of the heart and circulatory system, causing circulatory disorders. Yes, static postures in front of a computer place significant pressure on the lower back. Hypokinesia causes fatigue comparable to physical exhaustion during strenuous physical activity.
Aggressive physical work (especially with excessive stress) is also not conducive to good health. Some people return home with sprains and bruises, as well as in a state close to vegetable. In this case, they may want to have sex, but obviously can”t. It is impossible to expect a young man to become a bed god as well as a highly skilled worker if he works hard.
Too much sports is not good. If the other half does not leave the rocking chair, heart problems should be expected. Long-term cycling does not increase libido, but, on the contrary, causes compression of tissue in the pelvic area and oxygen deficiency in the muscular skeleton of the pelvis.
- Diseases and bad habits
European indicators in the European Union show that men are refusing intimacy because they are taking antidepressants. In our country, antidepressants, relaxants (depending on the strength), and alcohol are used. Of course, strong drinks help relieve fatigue and stiffness. They may even facilitate sex with shy gentlemen. However, addiction to alcohol brings a lot of potency, especially with age. Combining a bottle of beer with a cigarette can cause double harm to the reproductive system.
Hormonal imbalances can significantly reduce libido. Testosterone not only makes a man a man (voice, origin, behavior), but also directly affects sexual desire. With normal daily life, moderate physical activity and the absence of diseases, the male body produces the hormone itself. It’s not hard to guess what happens with a geynamic lifestyle.
Another reason from the category of diseases is the result of psychological trauma or upbringing. Perhaps your lover was once the object of ridicule from girls. Or he was brought up in the spirit of “ejectors are bad.” Then he subconsciously tries to minimize the frequency of sexual intercourse.
If your loved one likes to play a couple of tank battles in the evening or pay attention to the second “beauty” in the garage, you should not be afraid of this. It”s another matter when a hobby depends on it. If a man doesn’t want sex, but sits in front of the monitor every evening or is lost in other problems, this is a reason for concern and at least try to distract him from other interesting activities.
Yes, every man should have his own toys. But sometimes the stronger sex flirts with them, so they lose interest both in their real life and in their loved ones. There is no need to push or play to do this. The need to pay attention to a loved one is enough for him to be overcome by the same fishing that fades into the background.
The reason for this may lie in the girl herself. Many people, having acquired an “empty tap,” relax and stop taking care of themselves. In this case, they need to carefully examine themselves for unplanned kilograms, falling out or unkempt hair. Or does a man reject intimacy because of the difficulty of having his hair inferior to his lover”s?
Read also: Why does your ex want sex? Are there any advantages and what to do?
When a man”s ex-girlfriend asks him to have sex, he is often embarrassed. For what? Why? What does she really need? Their distrust is quite understandable.
It is very difficult for a smart partner to blame his beloved for the deterioration of her appearance. Usually men are silent, and they have a desire to have sex.
It is worth paying attention to your behavior. If we regularly emphasize his masculine shortcomings, lower his self-esteem and organize regular hysterical education programs, this not only discourages the desire for intimacy, but can also lead to betrayal (the young man will unconsciously try to regain his self-respect at the expense of another woman).
You shouldn”t even think about such betrayal. Finally, choosing a relationship between monogamous men is not the smartest thing to do. Usually, the above reasons lead to betrayal when a girl loses attraction (not necessarily physical, but ceases to be interested in her chosen one and his affairs). In this case, not only sexual rejection is observed, but also changes in behavior, secrecy and other signs of shell-shocked cattle.
- Praise for the great experience of family life.
Not a single person on earth is immune from the gradual fading of passion. When you have years behind you, when you spent time together, all feelings and emotions fade very much. A man no longer feels the need to win the heart of his woman and surprise her with sweet records in bed. However, for girls of any age, desire in the eyes of your partner will always be the most striking proof of his interest.
Radical therapy
As with any other important behavior, the battle for your partner”s attention must begin with exploration. Rather, a calm and open conversation. If a person is smart, he wants to figure out such situations himself. Further actions depend on the identified reasons:
- Tordogorism is treated with an emergency vacation, even if it is free. Distract your loved one from the annoying situation and give him a few days of peace. After rest, he himself will begin to be in close contact with his soul mate. However, this is heard only in words. If the next holiday is still a few months away, but you need to help your spouse relieve emotional and physical stress. High-quality massage, funny comedies and care will help a man cope with critical situations and fatigue. And a young man, surrounded by care, will definitely want to “thank” his beloved.
- With the disease, everything is more complicated, and this is where a medical specialist is needed. Hormonal drugs are prescribed in difficult cases when hormonal imbalance is to blame, which can be eliminated with proper nutrition and exercise.
- Hobby addiction is cured by the regime of a “house wife” who knows her partner”s weaknesses and therefore nothing stops him from using his desire for what he chooses.
The thing is, men want to know everyone. However, the eyes are not the only way to the center of the beloved. They also shouldn”t pay attention to your scent. A pure female body causes a wave of excitement among males. A few perfumes won”t hurt either.
Why doesn”t a man want sex? psychology of relationships
- If the girl is the problem, she should solve it herself (if she wants to, of course), and it is worth asking which type suits him best. If a young man has worked on himself for your sake, this should only be done if there is reciprocity.
- Watch your behavior and conversation. Perhaps the girl herself has problems at work, and she is throwing out negativity on her lover.
- Making drastic changes to your image can also help. Surprise your partner. Jeans and a sweatshirt with sneakers are undoubtedly very comfortable clothes. But an elegant dress and stiletto heels can excite a man”s imagination no worse than in a pornographic film.
- Great married couples are advised to return to the relationship during the initial “candy” period. Start flirting with your man. Intimate communication, small but pleasant gifts that stimulate sensitive areas. Remember how the stronger sex reacts to a slurred voice, a sincere smile or gentle tactile contact.
It is recommended to take care of these issues in advance. Try to regularly have intimate evenings with your partner and keep yourself in good shape. Keep your head down and don”t forget about your work. It is worth regularly changing the scenario of bed play.
The problem is that men should receive similar incomes. This is not only the secret of normal sex, but also the key to a happy union.
Proper conversation
The easiest thing to do is talk to your boyfriend and encourage him to declare that your sex life is not strong enough. However, there are some inconvenient nuances here.
- Instead of constructive dialogue, women tend to throw out accusations without thinking. This leads to minor quarrels and even real scandals.
- Men very often tend to underestimate the importance of the situation (a feature of thinking), which leads to zero results from the conversation.
To prevent Meesus from thinking you”re cheating or obsessed with fat, he needs to make sure he”s conveying the message carefully and getting the point right. First, we need to explain how serious and painful the lack of sex is for a girl’s mood and a woman’s health. Secondly, he should avoid making accusations and asking about the reasons for refusal.
Only the most withdrawn and indifferent person will begin to make excuses and turn the conversation into a joke. But in any case, the first wake-up signal arrives in his brain.
Too monotonous sex life
One of the main problems of Russians is insufficient sex education. Unfortunately, our people want to go from one extreme to the other. We can either spend our whole lives having tasteless sex in the missionary position, or we can change partners several times a month and have sex without reasonable restrictions.
Now we are not talking about raising teenagers, but about the insufficient knowledge and skills of already formed couples. For some reason, some of our girls think that it is very erotic (to put it mildly) to lie in bed and pretend to be a quiet figure that does not move. A strong half of humanity has similar claims. Others don”t know how to make intercourse truly great. All this leads to the fact that sex no longer brings pleasure.
This picture can be softened by reading literature of a sexual nature, which can now be found in any bookstore. Adult films can also help. New positions, new types of sex, paraphernalia from a sex shop. Believe me, experimentation and variety in intimate relationships will make your partner want to have sex every night. Otherwise we will all get tired of the same behavior.
Instead of solving the problem, you can create your own complex, saying that the man/husband has stopped loving, “I have become ugly,” etc. But saving a drowning person is the work of the drowning person himself. If your boyfriend doesn”t want to, leave the matter in graceful hands. The tips above may help.
