What if the third wheel is you? There is a way out!
Seth MacFarlane’s The Extra Man, starring Mark Wahlberg, became Universal’s most successful film of 2012. Chances are you’re not afraid of spoilers because you’ve already seen the movie. The film tells the story of a boy, John, who as a child dreamed of his teddy bear Teddy coming to life and learning to speak, and this dream came true. It’s only when John grows up and starts a relationship with an attractive girl that the talking teddy bear they’ve spent their entire lives with becomes a big problem.
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Of course, in real life we have never encountered a toy that comes to life, but the appearance of an extra third in our relationships is a fairly frequent and regular occurrence. Perhaps this is why films reflecting this situation have become so popular. However, in this article we are not talking about the film, but about real situations when third parties appear between close people.
Close friend
You can’t drop out of school, fight off bullies together, copy each other’s homework, go fishing, start your first relationship, and then she appears in his life. He devotes all his free time to her. It seems that the problem goes away at the wedding, and only the memories of your old friendship remain. What happens in your personal life is not that important. Perhaps everything is going wrong, and “the one” is not visible on the horizon, or you are generally convinced that you are alone. However, a girl who suddenly and easily takes your best friend away from you can easily become a villain in your eyes. After all, overcoming many years of difficulties and trials binds you and him, but what about her? Just long legs and big eyes? It’s not fair!
Not everyone can understand, let go or step aside and maintain a warm relationship when such a situation arises. Some try to enter into relationships formed through less important advice and try to become chronic “well-wishers.” Others choose tactics that destroy the relationship at all costs, squashing the best friend’s newfound passion with criticism and turning from best friend to enemy of the young family.
Read also: How not to go crazy with love or what to do if you get rejected
life is quite precarious and there is often room for disappointment and no room for love. Sometimes a person lives a full and happy life and has a loved one.
Single parents
It’s much harder for parents to do this when their best friend, jealous and lonely, is still able to let go. And often they become the tricycle of happiness for their adult child. In most cases, this situation arises when a single mother is raising her only son. A woman she doesn’t like suddenly appears in her son’s life. And in most cases, this happens because it is almost impossible to please a mother with sky-high demands. Add to this the natural fear of parents that their adult child will inevitably leave home, and the result is not a pretty picture. The son is about to leave to marry this painted upstart, and his unhappy mother will be left alone – what is the reason not to intervene in the relationship of young people with the life experience that she needs?
The voice of Ted Bear is Konstantin Karasik. the third one is extra. 18+| what is madness?
Or even children
How many fairy tales are there about an evil stepmother who took the place of a loving mother and turned the child’s life into a nightmare? Unlike adults, children are especially sensitive to such fears and find it difficult to object with good reason. When a father establishes a new relationship, his children are always wary and sometimes downright hostile. And if in the previous two cases we can still talk about a third wheel, then in the case of a child, the father’s new beloved plays an unnecessary role in an imperfect family.
Another problem in this situation is that it is simply impossible to call a child, especially a small one, to carefully and calmly assess what is happening. You can calm down a boring and jealous old friend by inviting him to chat in the old fashioned way, although not so often, and you can go fishing together without the company of a woman. It is a little more difficult to convince mothers that their children will grow up and leave home, but it is still possible, although this does not mean that contact is lost forever, but that they have left the family home in the same way as a new adult. Life. However, convincing a frightened and jealous little child of something is not so easy. If you find yourself in a situation like this, you need to tackle it with renewed passion. If she is patient and willing to treat your child as her own, sooner or later everything will be fine. If not, then you need to think about the consequences of your relationship, where you are always in the forefront between her and the child.
Results
If you are in the third additional position, gather your will and let go of the situation. The world does not stand still, and no attachment to the past will cancel this. And remember that the meaning of your life lies in yourself, not in others.
