“Do no harm!” How can your low self-esteem be dangerous for your partner?

Low self-esteem always causes inconvenience to the sufferer. But, according to psychologists, it can also have a bad effect on his partner.

Contents of the article:

• The influence of self-esteem on relationships
• Features of the study
• Experts” explanations
  • Low self-esteem! how to increase self-esteem! personal experience
• Is it possible to strengthen self-esteem?
  • 17 signs of low self-esteem / psychology

The influence of self-esteem on relationships

Bad times can happen to anyone. This could be unemployment, a deterioration in relationships with a loved one. When something unpleasant happens, the inner critic is immediately activated. Fluctuations in self-esteem are natural. That”s life, you can”t run away from it. However, you should keep this in mind if your self-esteem is constantly on a pedestal. In this case, a lack of self-confidence can affect not only you, but also your partner. Scientific research shows that in romantic relationships, self-esteem influences the satisfaction of both the person and his partner. If you are unwell, it may affect your communication with your lover. And that”s bad for both of you.

Features of the study

Even worse, low self-esteem is very insidious and can distort your perception of your partner. These data were obtained in a study published in the journal Personality and Social Psychology. More than 500 respondents of both sexes took part in the study. Subjects were asked to answer questions about their self-esteem. They were then asked to talk about how they perceived their partner”s shortcomings. People with low self-esteem have been found to fear that their partner”s shortcomings will lead to them. They also tend to see their relationships in black and white terms. In their opinion, everything in couples is either wonderful or disgusting.

Read also: Is it bad if a guy is shorter than a girl? if true love breaks out between a man and a girl, they cannot interfere in anything. Even height differences. According to statistics, more than 90% of couples.

Experts” explanations

Low self-esteem! how to increase self-esteem! personal experience

Stephen Graham, lead author of the study, explains For example, I keep changing my opinion about you. Now I like you, but then I don”t like you. Naturally, in such relationships people feel very insecure.” Predictability in a relationship is very important — this factor is decisive for her future. By the way, this indicator is important in relation to the quality of sexual intimacy. In other words, the more predictable the relationship, the better the sex will be. And vice versa. “In addition, low self-esteem always makes a person worry more about the relationship. He begins to worry that his partner will leave him, fall in love and cheat him around her finger. “Unstable people fear things that normal people don”t even think about,” explains social psychologist Heidi Riggio. This can lead to panic attacks and morbid jealousy.”

Is it possible to strengthen self-esteem?

Regardless of the cause or duration of your lack of self-confidence, the key to regaining your self-esteem is changing your thoughts. Negative thoughts need to be replaced with positive ones, Riggio continues the interview. Changing your self-talk can help a lot in this regard. Replace negative thoughts with positive ones. Even if it seems completely ridiculous, make an effort. In the end, it is your psyche, and only you can decide what to pay attention to — negative or positive. “For example, if you start to doubt your attractiveness, stop and think about your strengths. Remember that negative statements about yourself are fiction, a distortion of reality. And its appearance only means that you need to change old scripts and tell yourself good things instead of unpleasant ones,” advises Heidi Riggio. It is very practical to train yourself to think about positive things. The more you practice, the more confident you become.”

17 signs of low self-esteem / psychology