Body dysmorphophobia — how self-rejection can destroy your intimate life
Sometimes all people feel dissatisfied with themselves. However, for some people, dissatisfaction with their appearance becomes global and interferes with normal life. These people diligently avoid mirrors or, on the contrary, spend hours thinking about their shortcomings, concentrating, wrapping themselves in thick robes from head to toe and trying to hide their shortcomings under a mass of tattoos. This behavior is typical for people with body dysmorphia.
Contents of the article:
What is dysmorphophobia
Body dysmorphic disorder (BDD) is characterized by an excessive preoccupation with one”s appearance. Such people strive to improve their appearance, but any changes do not help such people accept themselves. The desire to become better turns into a painful obsession. At the same time, people suffering from this phobia can be very attractive, and others are often unaware of their shortcomings.
With body dysmorphic disorder, people are unable to properly evaluate their appearance and do everything possible to correct any real or exaggerated flaws. Such people often become dependent on plastic surgeons and suffer from eating disorders such as bulimia or anorexia.
Psychologists believe that body dysmorphic disorder often develops along with other psychological disorders such as schizophrenia, psychopathology and obsessive-compulsive disorder.
With BDD, a person is constantly afraid that he will never be able to achieve an ideal body shape and a beautiful face. This disorder can lead to depression and suicidal thoughts. The self-perception of discomfort phobia generally does not coincide with what others see. Getting rid of this phobia requires long-term work with a professional.
Symptoms of body dysmorphic disorder
Concern about one”s appearance is common among many people. For some people, this behavior does not necessarily indicate the presence of a phobia of disfigurement, although they appear to be self-obsessed. Some complexities and low self-esteem are not sufficient for a diagnosis of this mental disorder.
The main characteristic of BDD is the detection of defects that don”t actually exist. These include wrinkles, narrow eyes, a slightly elongated nose, and small scars. The most significant symptom of the disorder is that the sufferer views such minor deviations from the norm as genuine deformities. This emotion can trigger shame, anger, depression, and other negative feelings in the disfigured soul.
Body dysmorphic disorder is characterized by the following symptoms:
- A fixation on specific flaws in appearance.
- The person looks in the mirror only to determine whether their flaw is noticeable.
- Performance declines, and preoccupation with one”s appearance can even lead to job or school loss.
- They avoid having their photographs taken, fearing that the defect will be noticed by others and will persist in the photo for years to come.
- Concealment of the defect: a person with BDD excessively uses cosmetics and accessories. Using bright and extravagant clothing, they try to distract attention from a perceived or actual defect.
- Frequently touching areas of the face and body with the supposed defect.
- Excessive dieting and excessive visits to cosmetologists.
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One of the most striking examples of body dysmorphia in celebrities is the case of Michael Jackson. Every time he corrected one flaw in his appearance, he discovered a new one. This process led to a complete loss of identity.
What problems does dysmorphophobia create for sex?
Feelings of inferiority negatively impact all areas of life. People constantly feel depressed and unable to build strong relationships with others, form friendships, or form romantic bonds.
Non-acceptance of appearance (dysmorphophobia). Sobchak Stepanova. parsing
However, if a body dysmorphic disorder (BDD) manages to achieve intimacy, their partner can expect many unpleasant moments. People fixated on their own flaws cannot be allowed to let go, and they carefully avoid intimacy. And if it does come, the partner closes their eyes, fears being naked in any form, and becomes increasingly less restrained.
Sex with body dysmorphic disorder (BDD) depends on how the person is feeling at the moment. If they are acutely aware of their flaws, intercourse may cease almost immediately after the first encounter. People with this phobia cannot turn on a light. They almost always try to choose the missionary position to cover themselves as much as possible. Dysmorphic disordered individuals often suggest having sex with their partners fully clothed, and therefore try to conceal their flaws with clothing.
Heteromorphic sensory phobics are acutely aware of their imperfections, believing themselves to be inflated and pushing others away out of fear of rejection. Such people find it easier to completely abstain from intimate relationships than to live with the thought of being unattractive to their partners.
How to overcome body dysmorphic disorder
Today, social media dictates new beauty ideals. Doll-like appearances, achieved through cosmetologists, plastic surgeons, and Photoshop, create complexes in many women, who feel inadequate and unattractive. When these thoughts interfere with their lives, induce depressive thoughts, and force them to avoid them, body dysmorphic disorder needs to be addressed.
- Train your mind to respond positively to what”s happening to you. Notice the positive aspects. If no one has said anything negative about your new look, then it”s not bad at all.
- Focus on your strengths. Be sure to notice your positive aspects. These can be in both your appearance and your character.
- Stop comparing yourself to others. Constant comparison makes you feel imperfect. Focus on self-care. This doesn”t mean constant visits to the cosmetologist, strict diets, and grueling exercise routines. Pamper yourself with little things, savor the moment, and try to push annoying issues into the background.
- Find something you truly enjoy. Often, a new activity allows you to shift your focus from your external flaws to more important things. Hobbies can help you cope with depressive thoughts and make new friends.
- Seek professional help. Body dysmorphic disorder is often accompanied by shame, anger, fear, anxiety, and self-doubt. Professional support can not only help you overcome the symptoms but also address the root cause of the problem, which often stems from childhood insecurities and relationship issues with parents.
- Body dysphobia primarily affects young girls. Those at risk include those with low self-esteem, psychological insecurities, and a history of bullying.
How can you live when you hate your appearance? body dysmorphic disorder
