Love has passed, but the tomatoes do not wither: how to forget about the past
People meet, fall in love, and then… break up. Unfortunately, many relationships end. There are many reasons, and they are very different: predictable, not what is expected, illogical or spontaneous. Regardless of who initiated the breakup and for what reason, the past always leaves a long and unpleasant aftertaste.
Contents of the article:
When people are connected by strong love, it is impossible to leave a relationship that has not existed for many years. How to overcome the past and start living again? What must be done to end eternity?
Realize
With the intense love that burns in everything, it doesn’t seem that way anymore. Let this relationship last for several years. But that’s all. The relationship is over. It’s sad and hard to accept. But it needs to be done. The end of a relationship does not mean the end of your life. You need to accept this and accept yourself as an independent person, not dependent on another person or their environment.
Then there comes a time when you can easily accept the end. Yes, in life he was a good person, but sometimes not very good. Thank him (not personally, of course, but yourself) for the experience, impressions, comfort and not so much. But his time has passed. A new stage of life has arrived when he does not need to experience heaven.
It takes time. At first, thoughts about the past come often. This is an opportunity to reflect on the behavior, stupidity and poor decisions that have accompanied the couple throughout the relationship. Make a clear list of qualities that a person does not want to see in a new lover. Think through new moves and solutions in case similar situations arise in others.
You don’t have to regret losing the “best” man or “best” woman in your life. Rather, the past was certainly not “best.” The best is yet to come, and everyone creates it for themselves. Remember the iconic episode when a friend told a friend after a divorce. But we also have chocolate, strawberry and mint. So bring a spoon.”
Give free rein to emotions
There is a separation, either quietly, or with shouting and breaking of dishes, and then there is always an emotional residue. Unspoken words, grievances, unshed tears. Don’t keep it to yourself and don’t accumulate nervous tension. You must be free. Remember the first point – be real. And only a cold and calm head, free from feelings and emotions, can realize. So you need to put these emotions aside.
Read also: One-way love: how to get rid of unrequited feelings
love is an amazing feeling. It fills life with bright colors, impressions and gives wings behind your back. This only applies to mutual feelings.
Have a mini-party with friends with a bottle of whiskey or martini, go to a bar or a noisy nightclub and dance until your legs hurt and your head gets stiff from the wind. Is the “noisy” option not suitable? This means staying home, screaming and crying as hard as you can until the walls crack, or watching sad movies and crying (if you need stimulation).
Break the watch she gave you, put on perfume, cut the shirt, belt or socks she bought you. The same applies to girls. You shouldn’t regret it (this is a good perfume, this is an expensive dress!). These are constant reminders. And they are not necessary. You can buy dresses, socks and shirts – usually on constant sale.
Enjoy extreme sports such as skydiving. This way, you kill two birds with one stone and help yourself leave an emotional mark and make a new impression.
Are tomato leaves curling? help them quickly and effectively!
Reboot
Rebooting helps not only during breakups, but also in everyday life. It helps to gain strength, new impressions, relax your soul and free your head from unnecessary painful thoughts.
The simplest and most effective reboot is a change of environment. You can start small – with a global rearrangement in the house – replacing curtains and rearranging furniture. Change the supermarkets where you shop daily. And look further and further into different stores. An extra walk won’t hurt. Your favorite coffee shop needs to change. This always works before work. Fortunately, there are many of them, and the coffee is very good everywhere.
Take a walk every evening and change places – today it’s a park, tomorrow it’s another place. Then you get on your bike (or skis or skates, in winter) and head to the main square. Well, the global part is the travel. You don’t have to go abroad, but if the opportunity arises, you shouldn’t miss it. You can go to another city or to the sea for the weekend. Go on vacation to your grandmother in the village, breathe some fresh air, relax and, finally, visit your beloved grandmother.
Cleansing
You need to organize your thoughts as well as your surroundings. Get rid of everything that reminds you of your past relationship – photos, toys, gifts. They are useless. Precious memories will remain so, but soft toys will become an eyesore and collect excess dust (this is the problem of rebooting). They need to be cleared of their favorite drinks and food. Find another favorite wine. Go to a wine tasting, try something new and finally learn to appreciate it. This is a red herring.
Live!
Embrace your freedom. Eat delicious food and drink expensive wine. Go where your soul has been asking for a long time. Find yourself a new activity, learn Chinese, sign up for an art school or dance class. Live!
