How willing are we to sacrifice ourselves for our partner”s happiness?

Samantha Joel is a professor in the Department of Psychology at the University of Utah (USA) and an associate professor at the University of Western Ontario (Canada). Her research on decision-making in unhappy relationships was published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. Her previous work focused on subjects” self-interest in reaping the benefits of romantic relationships. This new study shows for the first time that the decisions we make in difficult or painful relationships often have an altruistic basis. “The more we believe our loved ones depend on us, the less likely we are to end a difficult relationship,” says Samantha. In their latest study, the researchers showed that people often refuse to leave their partner if they perceive that finding a new partner will be difficult for them. The likelihood of a breakup also depends on the amount of time and emotional resources invested in the current relationship. Read also:

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We don”t want to break up with a partner who is very attached to us.

• We don”t want to hurt our loved ones, even if we ourselves are unhappy with the relationship.
• At the same time, we can overestimate how dependent our partner is on us and what kind of suffering drives them to break up.
• This is logical: no one wants to hurt someone who has played an important role in their life. Partly, this is done in the hope that the relationship will improve. So, if you don”t want to hurt your loved one but decide to maintain the relationship, it”s a double-edged sword. The relationship can grow, and then we respond with gratitude to the past — after all, it was ultimately what made us happy. However, if today there is no motivation to find mutual understanding with your loved one, then in the future you can curse yourself for indecision.

Are you ready to sacrifice?